Totally right! Actually losing the weight is the easy part (wait, did I just say that?!), the self-esteem part takes YEARS to repair!
What really strikes me as "ironic" is the way PEOPLE's perceptions of me have changed. Colleen, you'll experience this too....
A....either they were my friend and are still my friend...
B.....They wanted NOTHING to do with me and now, all of the sudden, chit chat, flirt, etc (mostly guys, some women)....
C....FAMILY...it's amazing how these people govern our self esteem. My husband always thought I was beautiful, any way I am. He's actually the only person who thinks I"ve lost too much weight
My mother...you know this type...they THINK they're helping you or giving you compliments, but in reality every time they open their mouths they are criticizing you. You then realize you can not possibly EVER live up to their expectations and that they, in their own right, are ignorant of the fact that they are bringing you down emotionally. Example...saying thins like, "You are sooooo beautiful, just 10 more lbs!"
My father.....HE's always been a playboy...had lots of women (all skinny). I remember growing up and going to visit him (parents have been divorced since I was born) and he'd criticise my clothes, my hair, and tell me not to eat so much. Today, whether due to maturity on his part or simply because I am an thinner, happier, healthier adult now, with MUCH more confidence, he is VERY proud of me. I don't hold any of this against him, he doesn't know any better because he is too shallow to see the beauty in people who are not his idea of a perfect weight. That doesn't make him a bad person, just a little stupid and sad.
My sister.....she's mixed...half black...half white. She is 5'7 and 165lbs. She is GORGEOUS. All muscles! She's a ROCK! A butt that won't stop, extrememely muscular thighs from playing Volleyball, and size DD cups (SHE'S 17!!!!!). Best way to descrbe her is like a young version of Marriah Carrey. In her great way of bringing you down, my mother has managed to convince my sister that she too, is fat. Yet she wonders why my sister has self esteem problems...hmmmmm. I keep working on my sister. Telling her she's gorgeous, so does my husband, but she feels we only say that because we have to because we're family. Because of her ethnicity she is ousted at school by various children (black, or white). I tell her all this will pass when she graduates and she'll realize how all these things don't matter. She, ofcourse, can't wait to gratduate and wants to move in with me and hubby while attending UT Arlington :rolleyes: GREAT!
My sister in law. The heaviest and largest person in the family. She is 5'10 and must weigh about 350+lbs. she has started my diet plan and has lost 40+lbs so far. Good job!!!appicon Her story? A mother that only cooked fatty, lardy, unhealthy food and never taught her how to be healthy. After losing her first 100 lbs, we are going shopping to celebrate!
So...moral of this LONG drawn-out story.....it is the people in our lives that influence the way we look and feel. Whether we want to admit it or not. I had to seperate myself from my unhealthy friends and the negative friends/family and surround myself with upbeat "go getters". I found the people closest to me, to be the most critical when it came to my diet. They'd say, GO GIRL, you can do it, in one breath and then offer me a piece of cake in the next (huh?). They mean well, but they must also be trained to know that you are serious when you say, not that you are DIETING (I hate that word), but that you are making a LIFESTYLE CHANGE and focusing on increasing your HEALTH!
Ok....too much rambling....I just want to share the things I've encountered so that when you all encounter them, you're armed and ready. Think back on the people you work with, live with, your family, your friends. Who's encouraging you and who's really bringing you down? This is YOUR health we're talking about. Chose to change your eating habits and health, take the steps to change it, and then GO FOR IT! Once you set your mind to it, it WILL happen!
Jennifer