Not Sure How To Do This?

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Rlr.Giraffe

Banned
It must be tough! Change is always stressful, and this is a BIG change. But, I think you are doing a wonderful thing for yourself and for your family. It is natural for you to feel bad for John (because you are a caring person) but in time I hope you let go of that guilt... John is responsible for John's life, and it's his choices about his behaviour that have gotten you all to this point. It's so easy for women to stay in an unhealthy relationship out of comfort and familiarity, but you have done the hardest part and will survive these bad feelings and emerge a stronger person.

Hang in there and stay strong! I am going to join the cheerleading squad for you!!!! S... H.... A.... ok. you get it... :D

PS. Are there any friends/neighbors etc that have an extra couple of places at their table for the holidays? If we were any closer, you'd be welcome at our house. :)
 
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abradbury.5

Guest
Sharon,

Everyone else is right on the money.... At the end of the day, you know you made the best decision for yourself and your children. That's all you can do. OF COURSE you're going to grieve.... it is the end of a relationship, and you can care about someone even knowing the relationship is bad. Those things are not exclusive.

You're also in a situation where everything from now forward is unknown. That's scary! Even though your relationship with John wasn't good, it was still a known entity. Now everything is different, and dealing with changes in life can be stressful. I agree with Laurie though.... think positively and do some stuff that YOU and your kids want to do. It's not all about John anymore. You have an opportunity to change your life... A lot of people don't get that chance.

You're a strong person for making this change, and in the end you will be much better off. We're here for you :)

P.S. Jen is right on the money regarding John... he is responsible for himself. Some people come from awful situations and turn out to be loving, kind, successful people and some people come from great situations and turn into mean, cruel failures. Every person chooses his/her own path in life.
 
xenaprincess

xenaprincess

Boxer Insane
You guys are all so great...thank you so much for all the encouragement!! Yesterday was a very stressful day for me. I spent the whole day worrying about John and where he was going to go. Although we are not together and when we were it was bad, he is my daughters father and I don't like to see him so down and out. HOWEVER...during 1 of my angry moments yesterday, I called his mother and gave her crap for turning her son away when he really needs his family. HA! Boy did I look like a fool. John has been stringing me a bunch of bull!! According to his mother, she did in fact tell him to come to her house..spend the Holidays there...find work and so on!! He's playing on my emotions I guess so I will feel so sorry for him and let him come back home! Needless to say, I woke up this morning with a new attitude! No pity for John today. My priority today is to see a worker about financial help and set up the counselling for the kiddies, most importantly, Jessica and Alex (2 youngest). Decemeber 1st is traditionally the day we decorate for Christmas. I was really not looking forward to it at all. Now...I will decorate and the kids will help...tomorrow. I am not going to let John ruin anymore Holidays for us!
Also, I spent the entire day yesterday in tears. I came to my computer and checked on BW, and I have to say it was the ONLY time I cracked a smile, and then I laughed out loud visualizing Laurie and Bev and Jen in cheerleading outfits cheering me on! :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: C'mon guys...no slacking!! I wanna hear the whole cheer! :p
Thanks again everyone. I love you guys...you're the best medicine for me right now! :)
 
momstaxi

momstaxi

Completely Boxer Crazy
Wow just saw this part about John leaving. What alot to cope with especially now with the holidays. But you know you did the right thing and things will get better. I can't believe John lied to you about his family, you're right NO more sympathy for him! It sounds to me like you have your priorties straight and you will do fine. I'd join the cheerleading squad too but that is a site you wouldn't want to see! Then again it would make you laugh. Hang in there and Happy Holidays!
michele
 
MizBev

MizBev

Boxer Insane
Sharon,

You go girl!!! As Scarlet O'Hara would say, "Tomorrow is another day." I know it's hard not worrying about John, I worry about my husband everytime I see the mess he has gotten himself into. But then I look myself in the mirror and remind myself that HE got himself there and only HE can get himself out. It is hard when there is a child involved. My son is older and bordering on puberty so all of this is my fault anyway. Just stay strong in your resolve and remember that in the long run it is all for the best. We will all be here.

Bev
 
jray

jray

Boxer Insane
Sharon I am so happy for you! Everything will turn around you just wait and see. Everyday will get better and brighter!
 
Minty

Minty

Boxer Buddy
Sharon,

Just wanted to add some good old fashioned, he got what he deserves, kiwi best wishes for you and your kids (skin and fur).

Have the most wonderful Christmas Sharon, knowing that when the New Year clocks over you are in charge of your own life from here on out and you can do anything you want to.

You are an amazingly strong lady. I hope others who might be unfortunate enough to be in a similar situation to yourself now see there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from myself and Hillie.
 
R

Rlr.Giraffe

Banned
Ok... Here goes...

GIMME an S!
GIMME an H!
GIMME an A!
GIMME an R!
GIMME an O!
GIMME an N!

What's that spell? What's that spell?

(cartwheel... cartwheel...)

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.... (jump... splits.... ) SHARON!!! Woohoo! Woohoo! (running around with pompoms)
 
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