Not Sure How To Do This?

[xenaprincess]

Hi all. I haven't posted in this thread for awhile for a few reasons...mainly because John has been breathing down my neck!! Last Friday, I received a call from a worker at CAS. It did not surprise me at all after Johns performance in the hospital! I met with the worker at my moms house with my kids. The worker was quite pleased that John received his walking papers. However, I have to stay in touch with her until John actually leaves our house. If he is not out by this weekend coming, they will remove him legally! He was supposed to leave this past weekend, but his family cannot get here to pick him up until next weekend! They do not sound too thrilled at all that John is going back there and basically with nothing...no money..no job!!
Now that the kids have sat down and talked to a worker, it is more real for them that John is finally leaving!! They are so use to hearing him threaten to leave, they never believe him! My 12yr old thinks the CAS worker was an angel. My 17yr old wanted to marry her...!! (she was very pretty!!)
I cannot tell you how much I am looking forward to living without John. Freedom is so close right now I can taste it!! Will keep ya'll posted. Thanks for listening...thanks for caring!

 

[Lael]

Sharon, that's wonderful news! It's good to hear that things are moving in a positive direction and that your children are being taken care of as well.

We're still pulling for you and hoping that everything goes smoothly and that he is able to leave this weekend!!

(((((HUGS))))))

 

[xenaprincess]

So, John left this morning on a bus to Toronto! We left on good terms...both knowing this is for the best. I have not been able to stop crying today. I am grieving the loss of this relationship even though it was not a good one. However, I do have alot of good memories too. I keep asking myself WHY didn't he get some help...counselling?? And IF ONLY he did, we would not be going through this right now. The hardest part was watching him say goodbye to our daughter. It almost killed him. She has no clue that he will be gone for so long. He is going to Toronto with nothing...no money, no place to stay and no job!! He has tried to contact his family, but his mother and sister are telling him to go to a men's shelter!! I'm sooooo angry at them for treating him so badly and cannot help but think that it's really no wonder John had the problems with jealousy and control after getting a look at his family and how they operate!! I just feel soooo bad for him right now, and especially with Christmas around the corner. It tore me apart to see him cry the way he did, and I cannot get it out of my head!
As for me and the kids, counselling begins next week and I will be getting help looking for more affordable housing...after the Holidays. The boys are going to stay with their Dad for Christmas so it will just be me and Jessica here alone with the doggies. It's going to be so weird...lonely! We are usually surrounded by family during the Holidays, but not this year. Everybody has other plans.
There is no time to go through the grieving process as there is so much to look after right now. I worry about $$ most of all because I have none...nor a job. Now that I am here alone, it is all sinking in and absorbing and I feel a little scared and I know that, even though John had issues, I am going to miss him terribly and so will our daughter. :(

 

[Laurie_Duke]

Sharon...I think right now you need to hear about other women who have been in the same position and have come out just fine....just 6 years ago I was in the same boat as you....I moved from Oshawa to Brampton with nothing but me my 2 children and my neice....while the boyfriend was in jail...I started a new life with the help of strangers...but instead of feeling sorry for myself....I made it a mission to do good for myself and my children....here I am....Sales Manager for a company in Mississauga, making more money than I ever though I would....and have proved to myself and all who doubted me that I indeed made it and nothing or anyone was ever going to stop me....and for all that helped me along the road....I paid them all back with whatever I could....I cleaned houses for them...did gardening...babysat kids and animals until I felt they had been repaid for there generostiy they gave me.

I see the same in you Sharon....and I look forward to every inch you climb...and I will be at the bottom with my cheerleader outfit on cheering you all the way !!!!!

Take Care
Laurie.

 

[Lael]

Oh Sharon, you are so brave. I don't think I have any advice that can help you right now. But I want you to know that I admire your courage. You have every right to feel the way you do. This, too, shall pass, and all will be well.

Hang in there. You are strong and doing the best thing.

((((((((HUGS)))))))))

Cat

 

[Marybeth18]

Sharon,

I am so proud of you! It will get better with time. You are a very strong woman! Remember that we are all here whenever you need a should to lean on.

 

[Austin's Mom]

Sharon I'm sorry you're feeling so badly right now, but the loss of a relationship (good or bad) is still a loss and you have a right and a need to grieve that loss. I only hope you and you daughter feel better really soon and have a great holiday and a new beginning for the new year.

 

[MizBev]

Sharon,

Hang in there girl. It has been about two months for me and I feel better every day. I know in my heart opf hearts that I did the right thing when I made my husband leave. It has been hard on my son but will be so much better in the long run. Everything will get better in time and you will survive and become even stronger for it. I will also be there cheering you on and we will go through this together.

Bev

 

[Laurie_Duke]

I will also be there cheering you on and we will go through this together.

Bev

Oh come on Sharon....can you see me and Bev in our little outfits....

give us a "S".....give us a "H"........ok you know the rest...we must save our energy !!!!

Laurie

 

[Scrapper's Mom]

Even the break-up of a bad relationship is a loss. Your life is no longer the same, those things that were familiar are being changed. Your tears are perfectly understandable. All I know, is that with time, things get easier. Maybe not right now, and not for a while, but gradually, you will recover and be healthy and your life will go on. Hang in there!

Blessings to you and your kids and we are thinking of you -