msnitsirk
Boxer Booster
Thank you everyone, I sincerely appreciate your kind words for Sammie. 
Bear with me for a minute for a story about how grief really kicks you in the ass when you're not expecting it.......
When I went back to work today (I had been working at home and playing hospice nurse all week) I fully expected to break down again when they all hugged me and gave me condolences. I was prepared for that and saw it coming. What I did NOT expect and hit my like a ton of bricks was no one to say goodbye to when I left for work this morning. We had a morning ritual. I would get up and get her up and outside. She would then eat and lay next to the couch while I showered and got ready. After that I would say "time to get comfies" and she would jump up on the couch and I would wrap her up in her blanket. I would then give her kisses and tell her how much I loved her and what time I'd be home and what time and if pet sitter would be there in between if I had a late day. We did that EVERY morning, even if I was running late, I didn't care, she came first. Today, there was no one to say goodbye to and that's the part that really hurt, didn't even see it coming. I still told her how much I love her anyway and then cried the whole way to work.
I had slightly calmed once I got there and then there was a homemade memories frame on my desk as a gift from one of the girls that works for me. I'll post a pic later, it's a very sweet gesture from a fellow dog lover. It has Sammie's name on it and a spot for two pictures that she will add once I pick them out and print them.
I know many of you have been through this and I know it will get better, but it just hurts sooooo much right now. Each time I think I'm okay something else happens to trigger the crying again. This morning really got me and I didn't even see it coming.
Bear with me for a minute for a story about how grief really kicks you in the ass when you're not expecting it.......
When I went back to work today (I had been working at home and playing hospice nurse all week) I fully expected to break down again when they all hugged me and gave me condolences. I was prepared for that and saw it coming. What I did NOT expect and hit my like a ton of bricks was no one to say goodbye to when I left for work this morning. We had a morning ritual. I would get up and get her up and outside. She would then eat and lay next to the couch while I showered and got ready. After that I would say "time to get comfies" and she would jump up on the couch and I would wrap her up in her blanket. I would then give her kisses and tell her how much I loved her and what time I'd be home and what time and if pet sitter would be there in between if I had a late day. We did that EVERY morning, even if I was running late, I didn't care, she came first. Today, there was no one to say goodbye to and that's the part that really hurt, didn't even see it coming. I still told her how much I love her anyway and then cried the whole way to work.
I had slightly calmed once I got there and then there was a homemade memories frame on my desk as a gift from one of the girls that works for me. I'll post a pic later, it's a very sweet gesture from a fellow dog lover. It has Sammie's name on it and a spot for two pictures that she will add once I pick them out and print them.
I know many of you have been through this and I know it will get better, but it just hurts sooooo much right now. Each time I think I'm okay something else happens to trigger the crying again. This morning really got me and I didn't even see it coming.
