Lost my best friend last night...

Status
Not open for further replies.

uncouth

Boxer Pal
Hi all, thanks for providing this section of the forums to help those grieving find a semblance of closure in a community of like-minded Boxer owners.

I’ve often visited these forums to glean tips on taking proper care of my dog, and now find myself a member of the community for a much different reason.

Last night, while at an event, I received a frantic call from my girlfriend and her son. Apparently, our dog (Loki – 7 year old female brindle), had just run circles around them (usual occurrence around our household) as they got home from dinner, when she suddenly collapsed. My brother was able to help get Loki to the 24 hour AETC location just a block from our home, but the doctors there could not bring her back. Their best guess is that Loki suffered a cardiac arrhythmia. Her heart simply stopped.

I purchased Loki the first week after moving out on my own. One of my dad's famous rules was "You can have a dog when you move out." So I got one. :) Since then my love of the breed spread to my brother, and even my parents. Both now own Boxers (a brindle female for my parents, and a brindle male for my brother).

In the past 8 years Loki has been the one constant in my life. She'd be the first there to greet me, and the first to know if something was wrong. Her canine instincts were finely tuned, indeed, and she often provided a soft pillow to lay my troubled head on. When my girlfriend and her teenage son moved in, she welcomed them with a friendly bark and a wag of the tail. We were a very happy little family for 2+ years, until last night's unexpected events.

Unexpected, because Loki was always a healthy dog. In fact, aside from an attack she experienced at the jaw of a loose pit bull in the neighborhood, her medical history is a short and boring one. She went in for her regular visits, got all of her required shots, and heartworm medicine, and was always found in perfect health. This makes accepting her passing all the more difficult.

In fact, acceptance is something I’m battling with. I still expect to hear her paws hit the floor as I come up the stairs and unlock the back door, her tail wagging in greeting, doing her crazy dance, butt shaking from side to side… I know only a day has passed, and grief has many steps along the way, but I find myself completely unable to function. Something I didn't experience even with passing of family members. I put on a brave face for my girlfriend and her son (who slept with Loki’s toys last night…) but really have a difficult time looking ahead.

I’m hoping some of you can pass along something that will help us grieve.
I also have a question related to the passing of a first dog. Did you end up getting another? How long did you wait in between? And finally, any regrets?

Thanks again for making this a place to share our grief, and allowing me to ramble. I often find writing can be cathartic, and this forum provides the canvas. It is much appreciated.
 

samsons

Boxer Insane
1st. i am so so sorry for your loss :( dec 12 i unexpectedly had to put down my best friend - no warning - he just stopped eating , next day went to vet , he had massive cancer in his entire body. i went home with a leash n collar - devastated. he was my life , and best friend , my fuzzy slippers, and my kind ear when my heart was broken. 10 years is not long enough for a friend of that caliber.

when we got home i was lost , wandering around the house , i would start to get up from the computer , and look behind me first , so i didn't role over him and would remember. and cry again. next morning i went to get his breakfast ready ( half asleep), and would remember, and cry again. it did this so many time the first cpl of days.

my birthday was a few days later - my wise teenager ( yes its possible ) decided that i need a dog that needs me. so they found me a boxer " MY SAMSON " he is a rescue - lived in a cage for almost 2 years - he def needed me ! and i needed him - at first i was kinda like wow , this is to soon - but Sam saved me , i had to focus on his training ( he had none ) and work with him all the time. and slowly i stopped feeling like i was cheating on Huckelberry. Getting Sam helped me heal - i still cry for huck - somethings out of the blue will make the tears come and my heart break - but i dont regret sam - and i think he has saved me from being very lonely. (I am a single mom of a teen - home alone alot !! LOL) I am very glad i did not wait long.

so please do what u feel is right in your heart and for ur family ! you will know whats best.

many prayers ~ from huck at the bridge who is now hitting on ur girl - he likes boxers TOO !! and myself and samson

run free sweet fur babys !! we miss you !
 

bawlinkids

Super Boxer
I am so sorry for your unexpected and sudden loss, the only advice I have to offer is to allow yourself to grieve. These boxers aren't dogs, they're our best friends and I'm sorry yours is gone. She knows how much you loved her. Run free baby girl, run free.
 

Lisa H

Completely Boxer Crazy
Sorry, no advice, I haven't lost mine yet....she is going to be nine and I am already dreading it. Just know that you are in out thoughts and your sweet girl is running circles around the other dogs at the bridge.

Lisa and Justice
 

Cyrus2005

Boxer Insane
I am so sorry to hear about Loki's passing. I hope the happy memories of her replace the sad ones soon. Big hugs to you and your family during this sad time.
 

GDOGS1

Boxer Insane
So sorry of your sudden loss of Loki,will keep you in our thoughts and prayers during this most difficult time.run forever free Loki and Godspeed.
 

gary766

Completely Boxer Crazy
We are very sorry to hear about Loki. When my first boxer ,Conner passed it too was sudden and unexpected. I also looked to Boxerworld for advise on another boxer. The best advise I got is that when another boxer comes along you will know if it is the right time. Two years later we found Margo and have not regretted it.

RIP Loki angelicon
 

uncouth

Boxer Pal
Thank you all for the kind words, stories of loss, and advice. I'm still tripping over Loki's toys and bones as I walk through the household, so her presence is still very much felt here. It's been a rollercoaster of a day as we hunkered down as a family and discussed our feelings and memories. We've all come to a conclusion that we can provide a loving home to another Boxer, whenever we all feel the time is right.

I know that long after the pain and suffering fade, the loving memories of Loki will remind us that it was all well worth it in the end.
 

auntthelm

Boxer Insane
I am so sorry to read of your loss of your beloved Loki. I remember the unimaginable hurt like it was yesterday, but my loss occurred 2 years ago. I knew the next day that I couldn't imagine my life without a boxer. Crystal went to the bridge Nov 2007 and Roxy entered our family March 2008. Only you will know when the time is right.

I did receive a recommendation for a book about a month after Crystal died. At that point not a day went by without tears and overwhelming sadness. The book, "Rescuing Sprite: A dog lover's story of joy and anguish" by Mark Levine, really did provide some degree of healing. I don't know why it was healing, except I cried so hard reading the book that it helped to renew me. I wouldn't tell you to read the book too soon following your loss, but you may find some comfort in the story.

May your memories of Loki and the life you shared bring you comfort in the difficult days to come.

Run free at the bridge sweet Loki.
 

Cami

Boxer Insane
I am so sorry for your loss. Your story could very well have been mine just a couple of weeks ago. I thank God every day that Cami's collapse didn't result in sudden death as is too very common for our beloved Boxers. Her road to recovery is an unsure one. At minimum if she can recover it will be a long journey and most likely won't include her ever returning to 100% of her previous self.

I stay a bit in mourning every day wondering if today will be "The Day". I've pondered if I will ever have another Boxer in my life when I allow my mind to wander and quickly try to push those thoughts out of my mind. I feel as if I am "cheating" on her while she is still here. It has me very troubled.

When my Boxer girl came into my life I had lost an 18 year old best friend in the form of a cat. For 4 years I nursed her chronic renal failure and remember for those years that I found myself back then wondering too if I would ever have another cat after her passing.

It was about 3 weeks before I found myself visiting shelters. I told myself that I wasn't "looking" for another cat but was there to help the ones that would be found by another family. I would close my eyes and pet them. Desperately trying to touch one that had the same "feel" as my old girl. I don't know if it was cathartic or torturous but it was where my emotions were at that time.

My Boxer entered my life about 7 weeks after my cat passed. My heart angel in the form of a kitten came less than a week later. My family was "complete" once again and my heart still ached but I now had a job to do in the form of "raising" two new babies.

It has been nearly 7 years now since I lost my "Kitty" and I miss her but the sadness has been replaced with smiles in my memories. The two new additions enabled me to focus on something else besides my intense sadness and I was able to set Kitty free.

My girls now are my universe just as Kitty was for 18 years. I really feel that there are two types of people in the world. Those that have a heart for animals and those that do not. I feel it is the duty of those that love them to continue to bring them into our homes as there are far more of them than there are of us who love them.

Your heart will tell you when it is time. It might take on a different form for each of you in the home and one of you might be ready before another.

You can't ever replace Loki and I know that you wouldn't want to BUT.....when the time comes you will find one that can FILL your heart just as she did. You will be a better person because of the new addition. They just have a way of guiding us with their never ending positive energy!

You may want to try fostering a Boxer in need making no "decisions" before you are ready. Perhaps even volunteering in some fashion with a rescue or shelter to not only help those that need it but to give your body and soul something else to focus on besides your intense grief. It is very healing to help others.

Whatever you decide will be the right decision. Whenever you decide will be the right time for you and your family. You and sweet Loki will be in my thoughts and prayers.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top