Palladia info? side effects?

[djheitz]

Other than going with your instincts (which can be really tough when you're stuck in the middle of the situation), the only thing I can offer is this: When it's all over, will you regret not trying one last option, one more treatment, one more medication? Will you beat yourself up over it if you don't try everything? Or do you know in your heart that it's only a matter of time and you don't want his last weeks to be miserable?

It's usually pretty easy to tell when they have had enough and it's time to let go. It's much, much harder to know when to stop treatments and move into a hospice-type level of care. Do you know your vet well enough to believe that she is telling you what you need to hear and not what you want to hear?

 

[Lizzie]

I don't have any words of wisdom, but I just wanted to say I am thinking of you guys and hoping for the best. Debbie's (djheitz) post made a lot of sense to me and something that I will keep in mind.

It is very difficult to see clearly when you are right in the middle of it and it is your dog group

 

[Cami]

My heart breaks for you. I know all too well the difficult decision you are facing. No one should ever have to go through something so painful and heart wrenching.

For what it's worth, I think you are doing everything in your power to help your boy. If the medication to help him with eating doesn't work you can be assured that you went above and beyond in your quest to help him.
Minus calories/nutrients to keep his body going he might very well be affected by the Palladia worse and I agree that taking him off of that would be the next step. Then you are back at square one but removing that from the equation could very well cure his appetite issues. Then of course you have the decision to make regarding putting him back on it in an attempt to decrease the tumor size so that his quality of life gets back to a more manageable place.
Assume the recent meds administered don't work and you take him off the Palladia, he regains his appetite and starts eating again you might consider keeping him on anti-nausea meds and an appetite stimulant before starting the Palladia back up.
I apologize if this doesn't make sense, I am just typing out loud!

I know the situations are not the same but I'll share anyhow....
Near the end of Cami's ordeal she was on multiple medications. She refused to take one of the medications. I cringe when I think of it but I tried everything in my power food-wise to hide the pill to no avail. She would take 20 something other pills in a day but not this one. I am ashamed to admit that I ended up forcing that one pill down her throat (not in a bad way). I am also ashamed to admit that I was desperate and felt that it was the lesser of two evils. I knew without the medication that all hope was lost. For some reason it was the one magic pill that was going to keep her with me. I walked away from her after making her take the pill in tears and promised that I wouldn't ever do it again.
She knew I didn't mean any harm but she also knew better than me that her fight was over or that the medication itself wasn't working and perhaps making her feel worse. She wasn't eating too well that 20 hours with us after returning home from ICU but managed to eat an entire meal, go outside to potty one last time and then after hearing a noise from her that I had never heard before I knew it was time to let her go. As painful as it was she did tell me in subtle ways and then in a more advanced way (with the noise) that she knew would get my 100% attention (hubby's too).
I believe with my whole heart and soul that they do in fact tell us when it is their time we just have to be open to seeing it.

Sending you and your boy many prayers. Whatever you decide will the be right thing for Trucker.

 

[Independence]

It's the worst decision you will have to make. I wish there was a standard but every dog is different. My boy had the worst tumor on his face, he still ate, still played, was so happy and all the other things that made him appear OK. Once the palladia quit working his lymphnodes filled up and we knew it was time.

We looked a quality of life. Were there more good days than back days, was he really happy, had we done everything we could for him. Unfortunately you will second guess yourself one way or another. I think that is just human nature.

Make him happy, how every you deem necessary and know that you have done what you can and put it in the good Lords hands. God and Trucker will let you know what to do next.

We have been there and I wouldn't wish what you are going thru on anyone. Please know that we are praying and hoping that whatever you decide you will find peace in it.

Hugs to you, Trucker and the rest of your family and fur family.

 

[Tuff Love]

I wonder if a tube could be put in the leg so you can drain it when it gets to be so swollen to help alleviate some of the pressure and discomfort?
I wish I could offer something to help ease your mind but I don't think I could add anything that the others haven't already said and you already know in your heart. I know the gray area seems so huge right now, but consider if you would have went through with the amputation.... would he be in pain now? suffering? How would his last days be spent if it was too much for him? Now he is happy and still enjoying life and being with you and your family. If you have doubts about what to do with the medication you just have to go with your gut so in the end you know you tried everything you could. I trust that Trucker will help guide you through this group

 

[entelekia]

*sigh*

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through.

I've never been in your shoes, but I've often thought (or hoped, more like) that if/when the time comes, I would be able to make that decision. It's really eye opening to me to hear your story, how sometimes like you said, there is no "clear cut" answer, no magic moment when to say enough is enough.

I do remember reading on here someone saying they wish they had let their dog go when there was still a spark... when they still had some dignity, so to speak. They didn't, and at the end they felt like they waited too long and the pup's last days were painful and miserable, as opposed to happy.

Only you will know for sure what Trucker is like, how maybe HE would like to spend his last days. Do you think he would want to have a few happy days then go peacefully, or fight until the very end - even if that means his last few days are painful. Every dog is different. I know with mine, Laika would want to fight until the end - no question about that. Lego on the other hand, would probably want a few happy days then let go in a peaceful manner.

I know it sucks to be thinking like that. But rest assured, as an outsider even I can tell you have done ALL and more for Trucker. He was a dog no one wanted and you provided him with so much. Nobody would question your love and dedication to him.

Hugs to you.

 

[EAO76]

Thanks for all the responses. Trucker wouldn't eat dinner last night but around midnight he had two large milk bones and then after another dose of the appetite drug he ate two bowls of rice & chicken this morning. He was supposed to get his palladia last night but since he did not eat we did not give it to him. I thought about giving it this morning but I think I'm done with the palladia. He hasn't had it since Saturday and still seems to feel crappy so I don't want to give him more. The appetite drug causes drowsiness so he just lays around in this catatonic state. His leg gets noticeably worse daily and I know in my heart nothing is going to turn this around. I slept with him on the couch last night and he kept waking up and just licking his leg. I don't believe it doesn't hurt him. My vet said Cancer isn't usually painful but there is no way that having a melon size tumor underneath your muscle causing your lymph fluid to back up isn't painful. Also this morning he ways laying on the couch and just let out 5 or 6 whines. Trucker is not usually a whiner. I think we are going to put him to sleep on Friday. We already had an appt scheduled for his blood work & check up so I guess we will just do that instead. I just cant imagine leaving him here while we are in the hospital next week. He will just get worse and be lonely. And if anything was to happen my husband would have to take him without me and I wouldn't get a chance to say good bye.

I made a video about Trucker for the rescue 5years ago when he 1st was rescued. The song I used keeps coming on the radio. I have heard it twice in the last two days on two different stations. I just think its weird because its not a song that I hear very often. Also its been exactly 5years since we officially adopted him. We started fostering him in Feb of 07 and decided in May of 07 that he was staying. And its the same leg that brought him to us that is taking him away. We have come full circle.

Here is the video
Trucker at One True Media - share slideshows, slide shows, Facebook slideshows, free video sharing, video montages.

And here is a picture I took two days ago. You can see how he has aged.
http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l193/eao76/Trucksleepy.jpg

And here is a pic from today. You can see his leg. Look at your dog's ankle compared to Trucker's. They are usually all bony.
http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l193/eao76/TruckSwollenLeg.jpg

For those of you who have done this I just don't know how you got through it. All I picture is loading him in the car and walking him to his death. It just doesn't seem fair to him. I just cannot shake the guilt.

 

[entelekia]

Don't think of it as walking him to his death. Think of it as walking him to freedom.

Freedom from illness and pain.

You are doing the right thing.

*hugs*

 

[Mama's Boys]

I don't have any advice to offer, but just wanted to send some hugs and thoughts. I'm so sorry that you are going through this.

 

[johann]

Don't think of it as walking him to his death. Think of it as walking him to freedom.

Freedom from illness and pain.

You are doing the right thing.

*hugs*

Exactly this! You have given Trucker 5 wonderful and happy years. Try to remember him as the happy boy running around at the end of the video you posted.

Saying good bye is one of the hardest things you will ever do- but you will be giving him the gift of being free from sickness and pain.