Need advice about son/girlfriend

[Madison's Mom]

I'm so upset right now I could spit nails. I woke up with morning to find that my son had a girl in his bed. I met her for the first time last night.

My son is 19 years old, almost 20 in January however, I find that the girl and him were both very disrepectful!:(

Any advice on how you would handle this situation? I can't ground him but right now I want to tell him the "girl" is no longer welcome in my house.

Any words of wisdom?

 

[Xander's Mom]

Let him know that it is your house and you found it disrespectful to you. Ask him not to bring the girl (or any) back. He is a 'boy' and this is what they do-I am 24 so it wasn't that long ago So maybe he will next time (and there will be a next time) he'll rent a room or something.


god I dread my son growing up...

 

[Maxwell's Ma]

I agree that it is disrespectful. I would tell him it is not acceptable and will not happen again. Period...no dicussion!!

 

[Lola's mum]

I would be horrified if I found my son in bed with a girl.
My son knows that nothing goes on under my roof thank you
He said I'm old fashioned, maybe I am but they're my rules, end of.

 

[Austin's Mom]

Your house, your rules. I agree it was very disrespectful. I'm sure he doesn't see it that way, tho.

 

[4everdogs]

I would have woken them up. Ordered her out of my house immeaditely and told her never to return. Then I would have told my son that his behavoir is completely unacceptable. It is your house no matter how old he is and he needs to respect the rules if he is going to live there. If he doesn't like the rules - tell him to get his own place so he can make his own rules.

 

[sgbtab]

it is so hard when they try to grow up and don't know how to respect there mom's house. I am with everyone else tell him no sleep overs any more if he wants to be a man tell him to get a hotel.

 

[K8IE]

Ooohh, I think I would be pretty upset too, I have a while before I have to worry about that, my son is only 7. I agree with what everyone else has said. Just lay down the law and tell him that if he wants to live in your house that he must abide by your rules, period. And if he doesn't want to listen he can leave. I hope you can get it all taken care of without a huge fight.

 

[carver1102]

i am 24 also, my brother just turned 21, he also has a girlfriend who is the same age. he just moved out of my parents house, but he knew it was very disrespectful to let a girl stay all night, not to mention, i don't know this girl, but any girl with any type of morals would of told your son no too. if i was that girl i wouldn't even been able to look at you, let alone come back.

i would just explain to him, that it is your house, and unless he wants to come up with his half of the house payment or rent, utilites, cell phone bill, car insurance, and so on. then it is your rules, no girls in the house, end of discussion.

 

[SandyHG55654]

I agree, Disrespectful

Is it possible you just never set rules about this type of thing before and now that he is over 18 he thinks he can do what he likes? I think you need to sit him down and explain that although he is of conscenting age it is still your house and he needs to either find somewhere else to spend the night with girls or start looking for his own place. I know you are fuming but keep an open mind about it. You can't put all the responsibility and blame on the girl, he invited her over. I know sometimes as mothers we get into the overprotective mom mode where we think they wouldn't do anything like that unless "that bad kid" made them do it. She didn't force him to spend the night with her i'm sure.