lymphoma-nearing the end

[gena03]

It has almost been 4 months since Zoe was diagnosed with lymphoma and I feel like we are starting to lose the battle. And I hate to say "losing the battle" because she has put up an amazing fight and been such a trooper. She's still eating well and enthusiastically, gets up slowly to go outside but generally lays around most of the day. She is swollen from the prednisone and the cancer, but her breathing is what is concerning me lately. When she is sleeping, her breaths are shallow and she snores a lot, which she has always done, but it is a little more now and then. But her breathing seems fine when she is standing or sitting.

I have never had a dog who got cancer, so this is so new to me. Not to mention a nightmare. I did not do chemo, she is on 40mg of prednisone a day along with several herbs and supplements and homecooked meals. I feel like I have done everything I possibly can and now I feel helpless. I don't want her to suffer, but I am not ready to give up. Everyone says you just know when it's time, and I don't feel like it is yet. She is still happy to see me when I get home, follows me from room to room in the house and gets excited for meal times and treats. It has been far too hot here to take her on walks lately and I hate that.

I don't know what I am looking for here, half just venting and half just wanting encouragement for the time ahead.

Will I really "just know" when the time is right? I don't want to make a decision I will regret, whether it was too soon or too late. I just don't know how I can do this. I feel like my heart is going to explode just thinking about it.

 

[Nicos mom]

so sorry

I can imagine what you're going through, only for me it happened with a cat. This is just one person's experience, but I do believe she will give you a sign when it's time. Quincy sure did, I didn't leave his side for damn near a week and he finally looked at me and gave me a plaintive meow that told me he was done fighting. You will know if your girl is in a lot of pain, so I would just trust her and yourself, pay attention, then do what is best for her.

You know, animals don't have the same attachment to longevity and life that we humans do. They accept the inevitable a lot better than we do and with a lot less emotion, at least that is what I think.

My heart goes out to you.

 

[Draymia]

I've been in your position too many times. When is it time?

I go by when the dog is having more bad days than good and there is no hope of getting better. As far as my guys telling me they are ready. Yes, it is true....a look in their eyes, when they look at me, has told me they are ready.

Never a good time, but know you have done your best and too many things are beyond your control.

Give Zoe a big hug from everyone here at Draymia. :(

 

[hurleygirl]

Look at her eyes. She really will tell you. So sorry you have to go thru this. Been there.

 

[Roge]

Gee my heart goes out to you. As other posts said ,you will know. If shes in a lot of pain she wont want to eat ,drink or move about and you will see it in her eyes,
Try not to worry yourself sick about when the time is right just enjoy your girl and spoil her rotten.
Wishing you peace of mind and and lots of time to spoil you girl.

 

[rockysarge]

As others have said, she will tell you when it is time. Rocky had a good size mass on his liver and we believe it was cancer but never sure. That last day, he was walking very slowly and it was obvious he was worn down. As with your Zoe, he was giving everything he had but he was just becoming so tired.

When I was just staring at him, he looked up into my eyes and I could tell, he was ready. Its a heart breaking decision to make. Its been a bout a month now that I had to make that call with Rocky. Its hard to think of letting them go but you need to step back and look at how her life is right now. What type of life does she have, if it was you, would you be happy?

I wish there were magic words to say that would help make it all easier. I still cry everyday and still wonder if I did the right thing. Its hard to do but sometimes, its what is best for those we love.

I wish you and Zoe all the best right now. Im so sorry you have to face this. it doesn't help much I know but remember there are others here who have gone through this same thing. You aren't alone..

 

[Demismom]

You will know

As another poster experienced, mine was with a cat and another time with our Lab Mix. Both times the looks on their faces let me know they were done fighting. My lab's breathing got to be really labored so that also helped me know it was time, nobody, including an animal wants to fight to breathe, it's not fair. Also, it was all the time, not just once in a while. Hugs to you, this is such a hard thing to deal with. :(

 

[ZsaZsa]

I just lost my Cobi to lymphoma 2 weeks ago....... My heart goes out to you. I also did not do chemo... just predisone and home cooking. My family was my most important support.. hope you have that..It is better to do it sooner than later. Your heart will tell you.

 

[gena03]

Thank you all for the kind words. It is so hard. One minute she seems perfect and the next she seems like she's giving up. I took her to a state park today and it was like she was a new dog, walking fast, playing in the water and trying to walk across a log to follow the kids up the waterfall. She loves that place. I'm going to continue to spoil her and try to focus on the moment we are in and not so much the inevitable that will be here too soon.

I'm sorry for all of you going through this or who have been through it in the past. Cancer is horrible enough for people, I hate that it takes our fur babies too.

 

[gena03]

I just lost my Cobi to lymphoma 2 weeks ago....... My heart goes out to you. I also did not do chemo... just predisone and home cooking. My family was my most important support.. hope you have that..It is better to do it sooner than later. Your heart will tell you.

How long did your Cobi live past diagnosis since you also did not do chemo?