I'm Not Cut Out for Two...

[LookDeeper]

been there before

i picked up axle about a month ago and it was the same way- getting into things, using the carpet as a bathroom, and just being tough to handle. there was a time when i was actively looking for a new home for him but i decided that he just needed attention and love and lots of it he's a completely different dog now and i could never think of selling him he's part of the family and his sister loves him too! be patient he'll come around

 

[Kathie11]

I think he might be acting up to get your attention.

I don't mean to sound harsh but it's not fair to him living in your house knowing that he is second best and all your love is devoted to your other dog. I have 2 boxers and yes it was challenging at first but with proper training I think owning 2 is actually easier than 1.

I would suggest spending some one on one time with him so you can bond and do alot of training. If you are not willing to make the effort I think he deserves a better home where he will be loved.

Once again I'm sorry about being harsh but one of my boxers came from a home where he was neglected emotionally and I'm just thankful the breeder was able to take him back and we were able to provide a home for him where he is loved.

 

[NuBoxer Fan]

Thanks for your replies. I really appreciate the understanding that everyone has shown...

DH and I had a long talk when he got back from his latest roadtrip and we agreed that it is not fair to Duke to flop him from house to house, etc.,etc. I am going to look into training/obedience classes and see how that might fit into our budget, calender and thus and such. The one training facility that has come highly recommended has only had classes in the evenings during the work week, and it is about 35 minutes from our house. Of course, the timing would have me traveling during rush hour, which I hate to do. If anyone can recommend training facilities, or trainers in the area, I am about 20 minutes north of Chattanooga, heading towards Knoxville.

Will keep everyone posted, and thanks again for the advice and support.

 

[SILLY6PAK]

I am glad you are giving it more time but do noy beat yourself up if it doesn't work out. I hope it does because I do think it would be traumatic for Duke.

 

[Lou.ise]

To be honest Lola is now 8 months and in the beginning I found it really hard (should I take her back or not was a daily thought)
She wasn't as easy as Rocco had been, difficult to house train, into EVERYTHING (still is) and she just can't stay still for 5 mins, she isn't the cuddly type. It took me a while to be able to adjust but I love her to bits now and she is learning and showing her love to her mum (1 minute of kisses then she is off again). She needs 100% more attention than Rocco ever did. Keep trying I am sure the bonding will come. Don't compare them it doesn't help. I now enjoy watching their different characters the things they get up to make my day.
I have just posted a topic No Choice.... and Lola has accepted that she needs to be crated for her own good, it has made her and my life a lot easier.
GOOD LUCK

 

[agilityboxer]

It sounds like you are seeking out solid advice. I think the obedience class should help if you can fit it into your schedule and budget. I am really glad that you and your husband are doing everything you can to keep from bouncing him from house to house. I recently got back from my first week away from my three since I adopted Austin last summer. Even though he had lived with us for 14 months he still thought we were never coming home.... It can be very stressful for them. Good luck and please do contact your rescue with any questions too. They most likely have a good base of volunteers who have dealt with similar issues.

 

[mancin]

I totally know what you are going through. I rescued a 6 year old in July, and there are some days that she definitely gets on my nerves, even though I love her to death and couldn't imagine my life without her. She has some of the behaviors that you've described. She is completely obsessesive over everything and constantly looking for attention. Unfortunately, with rescues we don't truly know their background, and the only thing I know that happened to her is she got shuffled from house to house quite a bit. Also, I'm not sure how long she was in each house. So I'm sure in her eyes she's thinking "How long am I going to be here before I get sent away?" Everytime I start to get frustrated with her because she's wanting to be right in my face, I take a step back and think about why I'm getting frustrated. Nobody has likely ever told her not to do that, so she doesn't know any better. A lot of people didn't give her a chance, and that thought breaks my heart. I just take the bad days with a grain of salt and know if I work with her on training and obedience, her behaviors will get better... and she has had a lot of improvement over the couple months that I've had her.
Good luck with Duke. It sounds like deep down you are wanting to keep him, but you are just frustrated.

 

[Nellie'sMama]

Hey there!! We live in Chattanooga, and Nellie went to training at PDX. I'm guessing you live near Cleveland? We love PDX and Nellie goes there for daycare. I guess it would take about 35 minutes to get there, but they are very good. I really don't know of another training facility I would recommend around here. All the staff is wonderful, and Nancy (one of the trainers) has had boxers for 25 years or so. She is very knowledgable.

 

[NuBoxer Fan]

Hi! PDX was the place that our vet recommended... he said he really can't recommend with confidence any other facilities in this area. We are actually in Ooltewah, so the drive would take about 35 minutes or so. I will have to check their schedule and see what they have on Saturdays. That would just be so much easier for me, especially with my hubby traveling so much. Thanks for the good review... it is always helpful to have feedback from somone who actually had a Boxer at a training facility.

 

[kgf73]

I feel for you...I really do. I rescued Reilly when I was single and working full time. He was approximately 10 months old. He wasn't house trained, crate trained, socialized, obedient, etc. After 3 crates (he destroyed them all), and lots of patience he learned his boundaries. I've been bruised and scratched. My carpets are destroyed, and my house has literally become a dog house.

Take deep breaths and say to yourself "This too shall pass". I promise it will get easier. Take baby steps and celebrate the small achievements. Don't set the bar too high at the beginning. Lower it now and with each goal achieved set it higher. This way neither one of you will disappoint the other.

The key is time and I'm not necessarily talking a few weeks or months here. After 4 years Reilly is still a project I'm working on. I feel like we've gotten past the hard parts though and now I'm just fine tuning him. For example...I don't have children but perhaps someday in his lifetime, so I've already started working with him on some things regarding infants and children.

Reilly is a very loyal and great companion. He'll never be perfect though. He still makes mistakes. He'll always be needy and suffer from separation anxiety. I've never been able to get him socialized properly. If I give him an inch he'll take a foot, so needs consistant reminders of who's in charge. He keeps braking off his teeth, and has health problems. But I wouldn't give him up for the world, and am as loyal to him as he is to me. And I'll tell you the reason...I've had Mabel since she was 7-8 weeks old so she has this confidence that Reilly will never have, so while Miss Independence does her own thing, it's Reilly that is always by my side.

Anyway, it will get easier. I now have three dogs and sometimes I feel like the mother that lived in a shoe. The upside - I have my own personal entourage wherever I go in the house.