A (not so) quick update!!
I just wanted to give all of you a quick update on us! We are healing...slowly but surely! It is very very quiet and calm here all of the time (compared to how it used to be, anyway)! Tanner has gotten better about his moping around and the whining has almost stopped (he has developed a little bit of separation anxiety which is fine since I have developed separation anxiety also)!! My youngest (4years) has finally realised that Leo and Rachel are not coming home and is constantly telling us how much she misses them evertime she tells me that I can't help but cry but it is getting a little easier each time! We took some pictures a few weeks before.....I had them developed and I put one of the pics of all 4 of my kids with all 3 of the dogs "dogpiled" in a pile of leaves in frames for each of them so they each have their own reminder in their rooms...sometimes my 6 year old will talk to Rachel in the pic (Rachel and her had a special bond, we used to say they were both "spoiled rotten pricesses") I feel like this is a good thing and she is learining to deal with loss very well. My older two (11 and 10) are just angry...they want something awful to happen to whoever did this and they say they want to "watch", I am concerned about this as their father and I are neither one like this. I have been told that this is normal behavior and will pass, I sure hope so it scares me sometimes to think that they could really feel this way about a living breathing creature (no matter what he/she has done we are not the judge and jury and the person that did this will "reap what they have sewn")! Time will heal them I am sure. Against my better judgement I went ahead and let my husband go pick up his new puppy (I had changed my mind about getting it, I was not sure that I could deal with a new puppy when everything was still so raw). This may have been the best thing that could have happened....while Dexter (a shih-tzu) does not in any way replace Leo and Rachel he has brought light back into the house. Tanner dotes on him like the perfect big brother, letting him chew on his mudflaps, ears, and even his nub. It is truly a joy watching them interact!! I was scared that Tanner might be too rough but it is like he senses that Dexter is itty bitty and therefore more fragile. Having a puppy, with all of the mess that come along with it has certainly kept me busier which is blessing (busy minds and bodies have less time to ponder the unfortunate events)! I just meant for this to be quick update.....oh well.....Again I want to Thank all of you for you thoughts and prayers and BW vibes they have helped tremendously.
ps. "Holdens Mom" thank you for the wonderful card it came at just the right time, I was having a really down day and just knowing that someone out there was thinking about me and understood how I felt made a world of difference...a little bit of light in an otherwise dark and dreary tunnel!! I cannot Thank You enough or begin to express how much it meant.
). He/she will get theirs if not in this life....in their next life and each life after that! :mad:
