I feel so horrible

[Anna Begins]

I went home for lunch- Luka who is 14 weeks old today, was a total mess. He was barking when I left... wasn't when I got home but had pottied in his crate, had it all over himself, was all hysterical, almost hyperventalating. He saw me and of course, was out of control. I had to put him on my patio so I could clean his crate- which took most of my break. I washed him off and had to give him some water- the poor guy was panting and his tounge was hanging out. He was too excited to see me to drink, so I had to sit by him and pet him while he drank. I only had time for a 5 monute walk, then he had to go back into his crate so I could go back to work.
He's only in it for 3 hours and then 3 and 1/2 (my work is kind enough to let me slide out early). Today is only the 3rd day... during my vacation I tried to leave him alone in the crate for a few hours in the morning, but he's just hating thins.
I know I can't let him have free run of the apt- and honestly, I think he'd be just as upset. It's a seperation from me, not a hate of his crate. Last night, he went in all by himself and laid down for awhile and he goes in fine when I have dinner.
I guess I just need some moral suport. I cried on my way back to work. He broke my heart. :( :( :(

 

[harley03]

I too went through the same situation with Harley. It was really heartbreaking to hear the crying and howling when we went through crate training. I was lucky enough at the time to be able to stay with him throughout the day as I was taking courses through distance education (didn't actually have to leave home).

What worked for me in this situation was pretending I was leaving (putting on coat, getting keys, shoes, etc), putting him in his crate, and leaving the room. When he began to freak out (usually began with crying/howling) I would enter the room and give a firm NO! or QUIET! (Didn't open or take him out of the crate). When he settled down I would again leave and if I heard nothing but silence for even as long as 30 seconds to 1 minute I would return with a treat and praise, praise, praise. The commands NO and QUIET were essential for me because his anxiety would rise from crying/howling to elimination in the crate, panting, and destroying anything and everything left inside the crate with him.

Of course this took quite a bit of time and patience on my part, and I didn't work so it wasn't necessary for me to leave him in there every day. But I can say that it was worth it because he has adjusted well to his crate and now that I am working he spends some time in there without anxiety. Now if I could only get him to calm down when I leave him alone in the house :rolleyes: .

 

[Anna Begins]

Thanks!

I'll give that a try, maybe this weekend. He is really smart and tries to understand when I try to teach him something, so maybe he'll get it that way.
I'm trying to be patient- it must be so hard to be a puppy- in fact, I often tell Luka that I understand it's hard being a puppy. He just loves me so much, I know. I can't even use the bathroom without him following me in there. He has to get off the couch when I get a drink of water in the kitchen.
And I miss him as much as I'm sure he missed me. I can hear his little puppy barks in my head- even at work :(
I gave him a Kong- he has no interet in it. I put his favorite chew toys in there too. I leave the TV on and his crate is near the sliding glass door. I'm not sure how long he barks- could be the entire 3 hrs or 5 mins, not sure. Wish I had a vidieo camera. Poor Luka puppy :(

 

[hanley]

I too know how you feel

He can sense your feelings also & its like throwing gas on a fire,talk to him explain you are going to work,this is something you have to do,but you will be back.Praise him for being so good when you get home,even something special he really loves. This is what worked for me.It may sound crazy talking to a dog,but believe it or not, they do understand,I talk all the time to my Boxers & when I get home everyday we have to make a trip,so they can play at the River Park, like Moma promised & they never forget it either.LOL, Hanley

 

[Anna Begins]

They do understand!

I talk to Luka all the time and he does know what I'm saying- I'm sure of it! I can tell by the way he looks up at me!
I tried harley03's sugestion this morning and he wasn't barking when I left- who knows how long it lasted. I also put a divider in his crate to keep him from using the bathroom in it- hopefully :rolleyes: He didn't seem too impressed. (He barks as soon as he soils it)
Today shouldn't be too bad- I have a ton of work and can't leave for lunch, so my mom is picking him up at noon and puppy sitting til I get off work.
I did make it up to him yesterday- we went out to the river with his two doggy friends- and even met two more. He had a great time- was laid out! appicon

 

[kassa]

I was going to recommend a good exhausting play time in the morning (though you'll have to get up extra early to allow rest time before eating and then potty before you leave for work). If there are daycares available, that will be a good option in a few weeks, one or two days a week. (Screen carefully -- better none than a bad one!)

Also, I would make as little fuss as possible about your comings and goings. Seriously. Practice having cheerful ice water veins! Put the pup in the crate, go put a load of laundry in. Come back to the crate, let the dog out, ignore him. When you're leaving for work in the morning, grab the treat or kong or whatever, say crate, and if he doesn't go in, put him in, latch the crate and leave without another word.

The more emotional the dog is over your comings and goings, the less you should interact with the dog around those times. This means when you get home, take him right out (because he's still a baby and has to go out) but don't sweettalk, don't coo, don't act like it was any bigger a deal than when you got up to get another fork at dinner. The pup will probably be dancing and carrying on, but hang up your coat and fill the water dish or change into your around the house clothes, paying only enough attention to make sure there won't be any accidents and that you don't trip over him, and once the pup settles, THEN you sit on the floor and cuddle.

Dogs (especially puppies) feed off your energy. Now that you've had a bad experience you're going to be apprehensive and anxious about leaving him, and he's going to wonder what scary thing is going on that has mom acting so hyped up, and then when you disappear, he's still waiting for the shoe to drop.

You said he's by the glass door -- is it possible that he's seeing too much out of it? Squirrels? Cats? Visiting dogs? Foot traffic?

You can also try changing the tv channel. I honestly think that the cartoons my sister would sometimes leave on for the dogs hyped them up -- all that screaming and loud sound effects. I always chose something like A+E

 

[Anna Begins]

We get up early and go out right away, bathroom. then come in and eat, he gets brushed, eyes washed, plays. After about 20-30 minutes, bathroom, long walk, he goes in his crate when I shower (sometimes he potties in his crate even tho we just have gotten back). Then we go out again if we need to, I do my hair/ make up, go out again, crate and I go to work.
So, that's the routine. I try to not give any attention at all, except today, I tried Harley03's sugestion.
Dancing is a good description! That's exactly what he does! It's so funny! I try not to get too hyped up or show emotion when the crate is concerned.
He can't see too much outside, but there is quite a racket during the day- leaf blowers, lawn mowers, etc (and it starts at 6:45a!! )
Funny about the TV... I always leave it on the Style Channel or HGTV... I thought all the animal sounds on Animal Planet would work him up :D My friend thought I was crazy. But Stle and HGTV are nice and relaxed!

 

[pinkpuppy]

That's so funny: you have him watching style TV! very cute... Our monkey only gets the radio (wich reminds me that I should put xmas songs on for her :D )

You've got some great suggestions; and I have nothing new to add - other than "it really does get better" .

Our little Chloe is 4.5 months old - and she no longer fusses. When we first started - she did okay; but I always found her, and the blankies soaked wet. She cried when we put her in - and would start up again the minute we walked in the house. I used to go stand outside the window and time her - for my own piece of mind - to see how long it took her to settle in. Initially, regarding her always being soaked; I though that she would go potty in there (which she sometimes did) and then that she would bathe in her water bowl. We used to freeze the water; but that wasn't the problem. There were times when she would go in there for 10 min. (after eating) - and would come out soaked. I am guessing that she salivated -- due maybe to stress? I never did figure it out -- but it just went away. It takes strength, patients and perseverance. Just keep reminding yourself that it's best for the little bud to be in the safety of his crate when you're not watching him (so he doesn't jump up on the counter and brake his leg; or doesn't open the cupboard with garbage or cleaning products).

be tough!

 

[Anna Begins]

You've got some great suggestions; and I have nothing new to add - other than "it really does get better"

That is the best sugestion of all! It's so hard! He is still soiling his crate (#2), but I think it is a combination of him not going outside on the last trip because of distractions and anxiety of me leaving. I hope that will get better. It's hard because his breeder kept his litter in a raised crate so they could potty and it would fall thru to the pan below. So, he thinks it's ok to go in there. :( I'd rather him go in there than the carpet, but then he gets it all over himself- and it can't be healthy.
Thanks for the asurances!

 

[ulbsterx]

I know how you feel!

It's hard because his breeder kept his litter in a raised crate so they could potty and it would fall thru to the pan below. So, he thinks it's ok to go in there. :( I'd rather him go in there than the carpet, but then he gets it all over himself- and it can't be healthy.
Thanks for the asurances!

We brought Reznor home in Oct. 2002. We were dumb enough to buy him from a pet store where he was also in that type of crate (where he was just left to use the bathroom, etc.) For almost 2 wks, it seemed he would ONLY go to the bathroom IN his crate. We were initially perplexed, but then I had a "hello!" moment and realized that he had basically been "trained" to go in the crate and that was also his only option. After a while, he began to understand that the place to use the bathroom was outside. Because we have a house w/ yard and secure high fence, we ended up installing a dog door. He has his own doggie "condo" in the den that leads to the backyard, where his crate is. He has no problem with the crate and I usually find them both asleep in their crates.

Also, like many others stated, they feed off your emotions. For the first few months, he was always highly stressed. Turns out that I was the problem was because I was constantly terrified that something would happen to him that I could have prevented. I was also trying to make up for the fact that he had gotten such a bad start to his life by basically doting on him. To make a long story short, he ended up becoming very spoiled and in charge of everyone and everything. To work on the problems that I ended up creating because I loved him so much and want him to be happy, we had to work w/ a private trainer. But, like they say, hindsight is 20/20! Now two years later, we still have dominance issues that we work on everyday.

It sounds like you are doing a great job so far. I know how it feels to leave your puppy alone. I wish you both the best of luck and know that you will listen to the great advice that was given re: being calm and nonchalant about your coming and going etc. Take care!

P.s. is your screen name from the Counting Crows song?