Hi: (kinda long)
My Buster had terrible separation anxiety. He displayed this by totally destroying my condo. I did not stick with the crate training because of the noise of him crying and barking and being in a condo, but I sure wish I had.
I finally had enough when he had destroyed the couch, chair, vcr, curtains, blinds, speakers, etc.......The breaking point came when he was about 9 months old - going through the teribble teenage years! It was a this time that I was no longer feeling the love and understood why it was entirely possible for some people to just give a dog to the pound and not look back. Not only were we both very unhappy, but I was starting to realize the danger Buster was in of hurting himself.
Even with all of this going on, he was still my baby, and I owed it to him and to myself to get some help. Serious help. I obtained the services of a dog trainer and we did some personal behavioural training sessions to determine what his trigger points were and what signs I was missing when dealing with him. My friends and family thought I was crazy, but at that point I couldn't afford not to spend the extra money - this was my home and my dog at stake.
I am very pleased to say that within a few weeks, all signs of separation anxiety had disappeared. It has been over a year and a half since we sought help, and we have never looked back or been happier. My condo is intact, and I have even bought new furniture etc and he hasn't shown any interest in it. Gone are the days when I get home from work and be scared to open the door in case of what I might find destroyed.
With the separation anxiety gone, his other behaviours also changed. I was now the alpha in the house, he was more respectful of people (no jumping up), listened more, was all in all a changed dog. He is sooooo much happier, and so am I.
I know this is very long, but I wanted to let you know that it is worth the effort you are going to of asking for ideas. You and your baby will be so much happier.
My suggestion is the one on one session with the behaviourist. It only took about 3 sessions for our problems to go away. I would definitely ask around for some recommendations before going ahead, I am sure there are alot of trainers out there, but you need to find the right fit for you and your dog.
Thanks for letting me share my story - Good Luck - let us know how you are making out!