Aimee
Boxer Insane
Baxter's body was laid to rest April 9, 2005 at 11:25 a.m. At that time, Baxter's spirit began a new journey. His journey home.
Tuesday I called and made Baxter's final appointment. It was the most difficult phone call I ever had to make. But, we knew it was time. Baxter had fought long and hard and had finally endured enough. When I came home from work Tuesday night, Baxter did not get up to greet me nor did he wag his tail and it broke my heart. I laid with Baxter that night telling him of all the great friends he would meet and what I thought the Bridge would be like. The next day, Baxter appeared to have more energy and was alert and lively again. We thought this occasion called for McDonald's cheeseburgers and he thoroughly enjoyed his! Thursday was his best day, it was almost as though he had never been sick. Baxter was doing so well, we talked about postponing the appointment and taking things day by day though deep down I was fearing that this was the "rise before the fall". Jason and I stayed home with Bax on Friday and were again pleased to find Baxter having a good day. Our groomer was out to the house on Friday (mobile pet salon) and Bax enjoyed a good bath. Friday night it was pizza for dinner, Bax loved it! Before going to bed Friday night, we noticed that Baxter was beginning to decline. I thought perhaps he had outdone himself and was extra tired from the past few days. However when we woke up Saturday, Baxter had hit rock bottom. He was not able to get around or even lift his head up. He barely ate his breakfast and I had to hold him up to go potty. When I let go of him, he fell over. There was no doubt in our minds that we had made the right decision. It was strange though how he could go from so good to so bad. It was as if there was a divine intervention. We got three really great days to share with him and remember and then he goes to a point of no return. I don't think our timing could have been anymore perfect. I had always hoped I would know, I had always hoped that Baxter wouldn't suffer. I believe we were blessed, very blessed. My sister, nieces and nephews came to say good-bye to Baxter. The entire time they spent petting and kissing him, he never really acknowledged them. Then it was time to leave, that was tough. We stopped at McDonald's on the way to the vets office. They weren't serving lunch yet so we got Mr. B a sausage, egg and cheese biscuit with a hashbrown. He ate every last bite of it! Mr. B also had a few Dove dark chocolates before he left us. Bax left us with a full tummy, that made me happy.
Baxter's passing was very peaceful. Bax was tired and ready to go, he stopped breathing when the anesthia was administered. After Baxter was gone, his nose began twitching. I wondered what he was smelling and it made me smile. I used to ask Jason how Bax would know who we were when he was able to see again, Jason would say that Bax would be able to smell us. We believe that nose twitching was him sniffing us out to make sure who he was seeing was really us! That thought warms my heart.
The past 11 months seem like a blur now. Baxter was a survivor, a true fighter. Who would have ever thought we would have made it this far from his initial diagnosis. We feel truely blessed. We were very lucky that we got to celebrate many special "last" moments with Baxter such as his last birthday party. We were fortunant to know that Baxter was terminally ill, it allowed us the opportunity to take hundreds of pictures and make priceless memories. We were able to spoil him rotten and leave no regrets.
I know that Baxter is now pain free, running like the wind. I am so very happy for him, I'm just sad for myself. Life just isn't the same without him. My life became being Baxter's caretaker, now it seems so empty. I miss everything about him. Yesterday there was more of a sense of relief. Relief that he was no longer suffering and that he was whole again. Today there is emptiness and sadness. Jason and I have gone through all of his pictures and spent hours retelling his stories. I love that we have so many memories and I know one day they will make us smile. Right now is tough though.
Mommy and Daddy love and miss you Mr. B! You will always be special to us. You hold a very big place in our hearts which keeps you with us always. We know that you are in a better place. We know you are happy and healthy again. Please know we will think of you everyday and smile. You touched many hearts and lives along your journey, you deserve the best that Heaven can offer you.
Please join us in lighting a candle tomorrow night, Monday night, for our Baxter while he transitions at the Bridge. Candle lighting times are...
In USA: 10 PM Eastern
9 PM Central
8 PM Mountain
7 PM Pacific
6 PM Alaska
5 PM Hawaii
In Europe:
Central Europe - 10:00 PM GMT
UK - 9:00 PM GMT
Australia (West Coast) 6 PM
Australia (East Coast) 8 PM
New Zealand 9 PM
Thank you to all of you who have been there for us and shared in Baxter's journey. You have been such a great sense of strength and support for us from beginning to end. Please pray for Baxter as he transitions at the Bridge. Please pray for us as we learn to cope in the days ahead.
Aimee and Jason
Tuesday I called and made Baxter's final appointment. It was the most difficult phone call I ever had to make. But, we knew it was time. Baxter had fought long and hard and had finally endured enough. When I came home from work Tuesday night, Baxter did not get up to greet me nor did he wag his tail and it broke my heart. I laid with Baxter that night telling him of all the great friends he would meet and what I thought the Bridge would be like. The next day, Baxter appeared to have more energy and was alert and lively again. We thought this occasion called for McDonald's cheeseburgers and he thoroughly enjoyed his! Thursday was his best day, it was almost as though he had never been sick. Baxter was doing so well, we talked about postponing the appointment and taking things day by day though deep down I was fearing that this was the "rise before the fall". Jason and I stayed home with Bax on Friday and were again pleased to find Baxter having a good day. Our groomer was out to the house on Friday (mobile pet salon) and Bax enjoyed a good bath. Friday night it was pizza for dinner, Bax loved it! Before going to bed Friday night, we noticed that Baxter was beginning to decline. I thought perhaps he had outdone himself and was extra tired from the past few days. However when we woke up Saturday, Baxter had hit rock bottom. He was not able to get around or even lift his head up. He barely ate his breakfast and I had to hold him up to go potty. When I let go of him, he fell over. There was no doubt in our minds that we had made the right decision. It was strange though how he could go from so good to so bad. It was as if there was a divine intervention. We got three really great days to share with him and remember and then he goes to a point of no return. I don't think our timing could have been anymore perfect. I had always hoped I would know, I had always hoped that Baxter wouldn't suffer. I believe we were blessed, very blessed. My sister, nieces and nephews came to say good-bye to Baxter. The entire time they spent petting and kissing him, he never really acknowledged them. Then it was time to leave, that was tough. We stopped at McDonald's on the way to the vets office. They weren't serving lunch yet so we got Mr. B a sausage, egg and cheese biscuit with a hashbrown. He ate every last bite of it! Mr. B also had a few Dove dark chocolates before he left us. Bax left us with a full tummy, that made me happy.
Baxter's passing was very peaceful. Bax was tired and ready to go, he stopped breathing when the anesthia was administered. After Baxter was gone, his nose began twitching. I wondered what he was smelling and it made me smile. I used to ask Jason how Bax would know who we were when he was able to see again, Jason would say that Bax would be able to smell us. We believe that nose twitching was him sniffing us out to make sure who he was seeing was really us! That thought warms my heart.
The past 11 months seem like a blur now. Baxter was a survivor, a true fighter. Who would have ever thought we would have made it this far from his initial diagnosis. We feel truely blessed. We were very lucky that we got to celebrate many special "last" moments with Baxter such as his last birthday party. We were fortunant to know that Baxter was terminally ill, it allowed us the opportunity to take hundreds of pictures and make priceless memories. We were able to spoil him rotten and leave no regrets.
I know that Baxter is now pain free, running like the wind. I am so very happy for him, I'm just sad for myself. Life just isn't the same without him. My life became being Baxter's caretaker, now it seems so empty. I miss everything about him. Yesterday there was more of a sense of relief. Relief that he was no longer suffering and that he was whole again. Today there is emptiness and sadness. Jason and I have gone through all of his pictures and spent hours retelling his stories. I love that we have so many memories and I know one day they will make us smile. Right now is tough though.
Mommy and Daddy love and miss you Mr. B! You will always be special to us. You hold a very big place in our hearts which keeps you with us always. We know that you are in a better place. We know you are happy and healthy again. Please know we will think of you everyday and smile. You touched many hearts and lives along your journey, you deserve the best that Heaven can offer you.
Please join us in lighting a candle tomorrow night, Monday night, for our Baxter while he transitions at the Bridge. Candle lighting times are...
In USA: 10 PM Eastern
9 PM Central
8 PM Mountain
7 PM Pacific
6 PM Alaska
5 PM Hawaii
In Europe:
Central Europe - 10:00 PM GMT
UK - 9:00 PM GMT
Australia (West Coast) 6 PM
Australia (East Coast) 8 PM
New Zealand 9 PM
Thank you to all of you who have been there for us and shared in Baxter's journey. You have been such a great sense of strength and support for us from beginning to end. Please pray for Baxter as he transitions at the Bridge. Please pray for us as we learn to cope in the days ahead.
Aimee and Jason
. The pain of losing them never leaves you, but in a ways I think thats a good thing because you will never forget them.
