5 yr old barking at Daughter

[ericwood]

We just brought a 5 year old boxer into our house and so far it has been going great. I got him last Friday and have been able to hang out with him all week end so we could get to know each other. I have a 5yr old who he had an incident with this morning. She was at her grandparents house theis week end and she met him Sunday night, she was hanging out with him for about an hour and then went to bed. They had no issues with one another then. This morning I left and went to work and my wife was alone with the dog and my daughter and my mother-in-law came over, when my daughter saw my in-law she jumped into her arms and started telling her all about Beau. After about 5 mins Beau started barking like crazy while my in-law was holding her. My wife tried to calm him down to no avail and my in-law put my daughter down, Beau then backed her into a corner still barking at her, which is when my wife then escorted him to his create where he remained until my daughter left for school.

My question is:
There seem to be a lot of incidents with these dogs and children, did I make a mistake bringing him into our house? He came from a house with 5 kids from 3-12 and he fit in great there. What could of triggered that type of response with him barking at her? I know that they do not know each other but could it get worse. I am completely unfamiliar with these dogs and there is a lot of discussion on the topic with Boxers and children I want to make sure I have an idea on how to correct it.

Also he has shown 0 aggression towards my wife or my self, even our other dog. Just to my daughter this morning.

 

[CoraBoxer]

Imo people make a huge mistake a). expecting the dog to come perfect with nothing to work on b). trust/expect everything they hear about how a dog was in the past c). transition the dog too quickly to their routine/friends and family/situations.

Develop a bond with the dog, a trust. Introduce the dog to new people, places, situations at his pace. Read clues the dog could be giving you. A hug to you could be interpreted as something different for example. Doesn't mean you can't do it just have to be aware of Beau and maybe make some adjustments to the regular routine. Did he get to meet your mother in law when she came in? Did he want to? Adjusting to a new home means he has to learn what you want from him, whats acceptable and what isn't, guidance. This takes time.

Some examples i've experienced:

When my grandmother flew in from out of the country Cora wouldn't stop following her and growling. She had never done this before, and hasn't since. Was it aggression? No. Once she got to know my grandmother (we had Cora do her 'tricks' and get a treat from my grandmother, that sort of thing) they were best pals.

When I brought Kahner home, I was his 6th home in 2 years. The family that had him before me, returned him within 2 weeks because he had nipped their daughter. When I inquired further to get to know him better and what we needed to work on, I was told that they were having a party and a group of kids were 'playing' with Kahner and did not stop when he was letting them know he was uncomfortable by growling.

At first Kahner was great at meeting people but not comfortable with people touching him. Made sure to not force him into these situations and gave him time. Of course everyone wanted to go straight for him and pet. Family and strangers. He's doing awesome now. I'll never know exactly where he came from and what he's been through.

What are you talking about when you say...

incidents with these dogs and children

In general boxers are super with people and kids in particular. But you can't expect this from a dog you just adopted. Socialise, bond, establish rules, supervise etc.

 

[LILYLARUE]

From what I can gather from your post is that he is not aggressive. This was not aggressive behavior. If it were, he would have gotten physical.

What I can surmise from the limited info is that he met your daughter and just as they were developing a "friendship" is that a stranger came in and picked up his new "friend" and he wasn't sure what to do at that moment. He was barking what his feelings were and vocalizing his confusion. he was thinking: "What should I do? She's touching her! Should I bite her? Should I run away? I don't know what to do? And I don't trust these humans enough yet to do what they would want me to do." Silly as it sounds, these thoughts were running through his head, rapid speed. He didn't have enough confidence, control, or trust in the situation to do what you had in your head that he should have done. So, he did what he could only do - bark out his discomforts. An analogy: You go to a small party with a friend you just met a few weeks ago. All of a sudden, two men start to wrestle, make snide remarks, chest bump, etc.....you don't know these guys nor know just how serious their attempts at starting a fight is. What would you do? Would you just stand there and watch? Would you jump in and break it up? Would you yell out remarks to break the tension? Would you turn and leave the party? The dog was in the same parallel situation with not enough connection to the people to make any decision.

This was a missed moment of a great training opportunity. A chance to socialize with a stranger one on one. An introduction of strangers is so important. But what is most important during a meeting in the home, is that everyone else in the room, except the handler and the stranger, should be close to the dog. The dog should always have room to move freely to sniff and gather info about the stranger without any distractions or feeling crowded. The dog should be ignored until he shows signs of wanting to interact with a person. Never allow strangers to rough house with him or grab him, pick him up or embrace him. Once he gets to know "his family friends" he will be more comfortable in interacting with them on different levels. Until his place in his pack is established and he is understanding of who belongs in the tight knit pack, he shouldn't be put into situations that any decisions on behavior need to be made. Allow him time to find his place, get to intimately bond with his family, and closely bond with family friends, and then he will be able to make in those situations, decisions that are best for his "pack".

Adopted pets always need time to adjust into their new family. It's never an immediate thing when the dog had a previous life. There are always adjustments and shifts in the dog's brain to learn to accept a whole new way of life and to make decisions that make his people very happy. That's all dogs truly want......is their packs to be happy and love that he belongs.

 

[ericwood]

When I say "Incidents with these dogs and children" there seems to be a lot on this forum in regards to issues with kids.

Also I was not home yesterday when this happened, my wife called and told me about it. Let me update on what is going on. Last night I got home and everything is going great, Beau is happy to see me and things are back as they where when I left to go to work. He seems to be great around my daughter now and shows no signs of aggression at all. We have her giving him his food and issuing commands that we know he is familiar with and rewarding him for it.

I think that the issue was with my mother -in-law and not my daughter. We are still going to keep an eye on him but when I was leaving this morning he was laying on his back and my daughter was rubbing his belly, he seems to be following her around the house, seemingly interested in what she is doing, with his little nub just wagging away. HE is also never growled at her or shown any other signs of aggression other then the barking yesterday. It was still a strange episode.

I am not new to handling dogs and I have an understanding of their pack mentality. I just have never had experience in Boxers and didn't know what their quirks where when it came to children and as I said, reading through this forum, there seems to be a lot of post about behavioral issues. Beau seems to be adjusting very nice, we just have to keep an eye on him for now, the good news is he has yet to nip at any one. I have every intention of him staying as part of our family for the remainder of his life, I know that dogs have quirks, but I appreciate your response.

 

[ericwood]

I want to thank you guys for the help. We have determined it to be my mother-in-law. He is absolutely fine with my daughter but when my mother-in-law comes to take her for a visit or what ever he completely freaks out when they are leaving. He is fine with my mother-in-law in the house and hanging out, its only when they go to leave that he starts barking. We will work on this more but he is an awesome addition to our family, it just seems odd to me that he is that protective after less than a week in our house.

 

[johann]

I want to thank you guys for the help. We have determined it to be my mother-in-law. He is absolutely fine with my daughter but when my mother-in-law comes to take her for a visit or what ever he completely freaks out when they are leaving. He is fine with my mother-in-law in the house and hanging out, its only when they go to leave that he starts barking. We will work on this more but he is an awesome addition to our family, it just seems odd to me that he is that protective after less than a week in our house.

The protectiveness could also be insecurity or anxiety. I know some people value protectiveness in their dogs, but am I not one that does. Johann will bark/stand at attention/protect on command, but he is not allowed to guard me/DH/son. We started this when we tried to adopt a dog with severe resource guarding issues, and it has carried over to Johann even after the other dog had to be returned.

Can you start giving him a kong or a treat that will keep him busy when your MIL is getting ready to leave? That way you can break the pattern of behavior that is developing....the more he practices it, the harder it will be to change it (as I'm sure you know ). It sounds like you are on the right track with your new boxer, so good luck.