We Think We've Done All We Can Do

[EAO76]

If you’re truly at your wits end and honestly don’t like the dog then return him. It’s the kindest thing to do and especially if the breeder is willing to take him back. Maybe they can contact one of the families that took his littermates. It sounds like your dog would be happier in a home where he has a playmate.

Good luck & keep us posted. I think your honestly could help others in the future.

 

[ELubas]

We've already put so much into him, when will we start to see the fruits of our labor? Seriously - will it take until he's 5 years old, or should he settle at around 3 years? If he's going to be like this for the next 10 years, then I'm being honest by saying that I simply can't do it. If there's some light at the end of the tunnel, perhaps we can do it for a little while more.

we would even keep him until she could rehome him as to not upset him twice.

There is simply no way to know but if you are this stressed I think you should at least consider giving him back now while he is young and can easily adapt to another home. Sounds like you both need a fresh start. And again, I do wish you and this pup the best

 

[Caney Creek]

He's not from a BYB. Infact both parents and canadian and american champions. We do have a contract to return to breeder if we can't keep him. I was just wondeirng how to approach them since we're now friends and It's very uncomfortable.

If your neighbor you got him from is a reputable breeder, not only should she should be willing to take back a dog that doesn't work out, but she should also be available to help her puppy-buyers to ensure that they DO work out. She might be the best person to talk to about the problems you're having with her dog. Maybe she doesn't quite comprehend the extent of his behavioral issues when you've brought them up in the past. Maybe it would help for her to see it first-hand. She might see the problem right away and tell you what you can do to fix it, or she might say "Wow, you're right -- this dog really IS an unusual case." Either way, it's definitely worth asking her for help before throwing in the towel. Don't be afraid to express how frustrated you've become with him. That will help her see the seriousness of it, and I'm sure she will appreciate that you made one last effort before giving him up.

Do your dogs constantly whine and cry even after and hour of training, and a 1 hour walk? Do they constantly look for and get into trouble? Are they confined to their crate even at 2 years old after nearly 2 years of training? Honestly?? Are they really all this horrible? Am I to really believe that I have a typical boxer? Come on?

I came to this board for advice and help, not to be jumped on and accused of being a nieve idiot and not doing my research. Honestly, no one I ever spoke with about boxers said it would be this time consuming and unrewarding for such a long period of time. We wanted a dog to be part of our lives, not for our dog to be the center of our lives, and at the root of all evil.

If anyone has anything constructive to say, I am open to hear it.

What kind of stimulation does he get besides the walks and runs? Do you take him places with you? Does he get to play with other dogs regularly? Stimulation like that will really help tire him out. Of course they still need exercise, but if you go through the same exercise and training routine day after day, he will get bored of it very quickly. My girls tend to be much more worn out if we take an outing to a new park or visit a new place, or if they get to play with a doggy friend. A good friend of ours who lives right down the street has a male chocolate lab just a few months younger than Caney, and they see each other at least once a week. We get to sit around and chat while they play, and the next day Caney is always pooped.

Boxers are love-bugs and attention-seekers. If they don't have some good praise every day they will find other ways to get attention. How much time do you spend just sitting with him and petting him or talking to him? How often do you watch him while he's playing and just laugh at the silly things he does? Could it be possible that you're so completely fed up with him at this point that you aren't able to enjoy his company? It's very likely that your boy is getting into so much trouble because that's the only way he knows to get your attention. That, of course, makes you not want to give him any attention, which in turn only makes him more desperate for it. Even if it's negative attention, he'll take it. So it becomes a never-ending cycle.

My guess is that you and your family are so annoyed with him at this point that you already have that mindset when you come home from work or sit down in the living room. Your feelings about him are likely to only get worse if you are constantly expecting him to do something wrong and not letting go of what he did yesterday. My BF had a few months like that during Caney's "teen" phase; he just couldn't seem to let go of all the things she decided to chew on. But he did eventually get over it, and of course she got better too.

 

[Just-A-Clown]

I guess this is a more serious problem than I first thought. Sometimes when people say things like "we don't really like him very much" it is because they are frustrated, and not that they really dislike the animal. It sounds like in your case there could be some real resentment. If that's the case you will never gain any ground with this dog and the best thing would be to just bring him back to your breeder.

I certainly wasn't trying to belittle or attack you, I'm really sorry if you took it that way. I was trying to help. We see so many young Boxers out there that people give up on because that cute puppy breath is gone and they are left with this out of control youngster that they don't like anymore. Maybe that's not the case here, you sound like a responsible owner to me and I wish the best for you and your pup.

 

[thedogmother]

Boxer Rescues are the bizziest of rescues....go to different rescue groups, you'll see a lot of young 'uns on their available dogs page, and that is because of their wild & crazy (boxer) behavior. I am going thru this with BigPapi34, he's 14 mos old. Driving us nuts...but this is our 3rd boxer, so we are used to this behaviour. He whines like crazy, but we don't pay attention and after a while he'll stop and go do what he does. Believe me, it takes a lot of patience. We also have a 7 yr old boxer/pit bull female who is the alpha and puts him in his place when BigPapi34 starts to annoy her.

BigPapi34 (named after David Ortiz of the Boston Red Sox) realizes when he's being a pest, and after a while, he'll just come jump on my lap and crash, and snores away. He is a 'chin rester" placing his chin on our feet, on our knees, he always has to be with us. We are his pack. I put him in his crate in the afternoon for 1.5-2 hrs a day, so he can chill out. We then go for a walk, and by late afternoon, he starts to wind down. By supper time, he is just about out. He sits on our lap all evening. We love every minute of it.

Maybe a boxer is not for you, or you could try adopting a younger and opposite sex boxer, so they can box and whine together! You'll have to put your nick nacks and anything breakable up higher or away.

To me, boxers are the best breed, they arent for everyone. One breeder told me they grow tall their first year, fill out their second, and grow their brains the third year! I think many boxer owners here can agree with that!

Be patient, it is worth it!

Claire

 

[ELubas]

To me, boxers are the best breed, they arent for everyone. One breeder told me they grow tall their first year, fill out their second, and grow their brains the third year! I think many boxer owners here can agree with that!


Claire

This is so true I will remember this as a way to "warn" potential boxer owners about what they are getting themselves into! Just when you are ready to scream they become somewhat manageable and none of mine have ever gotten there before three years of age

 

[LILYLARUE]

I can completely understand what point you are at right now. Believe me! I have a rescued 3 yr old pit and about 1-1/2 mos ago, I posted a "last ditch" letter on here as well. All I can say is once I realized where I was mentally with her, things changed. Not sure if her brain woke up, or my energy changed and she relaxed. I have no idea. But, what I can say, is when I finally could release these thoughts, out there in public, to other's that understood........it was like a weight off my shoulders.

I went home after posting that thread and took a breath before going into the house. At that point, I concluded that I was now only a foster and actively looking for her forever home. Within 2-3 weeks, she turned into this well trained dog. I have no idea what the hell happened, but whatever it was I'm gonna enjoy it. It's was like a lightbulb turned on in her. I was more relaxed about only having to "wait out the fostering" just a bit more.

So, my thoughts are for you............wait it out a bit more. Just let it go and breathe. Wash your hands of him for a few days. Ignore him. Pet him when he comes to you, but if only for a brief moment, take it. Relaxing yourself and relinquishing the stress just may be what he needs. An energy change in the pack.

I could be totally crazy here. I could be reading too much into my situation to even think about transferring it to yours. I can only say, that relaxing and not expecting anything from my girl, just made things so much better. Give it a try. You let it out here, you are getting some really good support. See what happens. And if in a few weeks, while trying the other's suggestions here, see if anything changes. If not, then finding him the right home is the best thing for all. There are those dogs that are just different. Finding the right place for him may be the place he fits right in.

 

[BoxerMom999]

Why not ask the breeder for some help? Perhaps your pup could stay with her for a week. She may be able to offer some advice after living with him for awhile. And perhaps living with other dogs will help to drain some of his energy. That would also give you and your family some breathing time. Boxers are truly wonderful dogs.

Does he get any exercise in the morning before everyone leaves for work? Does he have any exercise during the day? It sounds as though he is waiting all day and of course, when you get home you are tired and want to relax. He wants to go all out. Are you the one doing all the work? Is there someone else helping?

I am sorry that you have not bonded with him. It does sound like you have made quite an effort but so far it has not paid off. I venture to guess though that it would in time. I truly love boxers and believe that they are the best. I wish everyone could know them and love them. But if you have decided that he is not the dog for you and your family then it would be best to re-home. I do think LILYLARUE has some good advice. Perhaps if you thought of him as a foster you would be able to lower your expectations. And perhaps he would settle down a bit.

Please keep us informed - we do care.

 

[JinaU]

I don't know about anyone else but it has been my experience that the males always seem to be more so like this than the females. My Luke (7mnths) cannot sit down for one second...I swear! He doesn't get near as much exercise as what he should and I feel like that is most of his problem...but then again who knows. He roams all the time!!! He's never attempted to chew anything up or even get in the trash...he will walk by and sniff at it sometimes but we keep a close eye on him. Who's to say what he would do though if left alone. If I didn't have nice leather furniture I might try it sometime.
I feel for you and have been in somewhat of a similar situation...not with a boxer though. I too think that you might be past the point of getting over the resentment as was the case with myself.
Good luck!

 

[meekasmom]

you need to do what keeps you sane, its hard with kids and a busy boxer or any dog for that matter, i know...i work all day have 2 kids at different stages in life one is 2 1/2 and the other is 11, i work full time and run a house hold....as well i have 2 small dogs, and it was way too mush i was drained. My mother in law took my girl and that lasted a week and she brought her home to me, so i had to make the choise, to let mytwo little ones go, my mom took on and our very close friend took the other one. so i do know how you feel....i have read that boxers do not respond to your typical training, you need to maybe try and show her when its time to play and when its time to relax...maybe for a bit try create her when its unwind time, and see if that helps, i have lucked out and my girl is really mellow, but i know they say that her create is a create tool for training.
good luck and what ever you decide will be whats right for you and your family.