You know the first thing I want to say is Congrats on the fact that he is a "boyfriend you USED to live with" because he sounds like a real loser. To put a young dog like that in jeopardy of losing her life from pregnancy and birth without even talking to you first. Good Luck on those babies, 12 will be a really big responsibility. I think that the tails definately need to be cropped, but make sure the vet does use something to numb the pain as someone else already stated. Dew claw removal is very important also because boxers box and these can be easily ripped off. My baby still has hers and I worry everyday that she is going to rip them off, if she ever needs to be put under for anything (didn't know how important it was for them to be removed when I had her spayed because I didn't know about this fine place BW) I plan to have them removed then, just don't want to risk putting her under for just dewclaw removal. As far as the ears, that would be the responsibility of the owners that purchase the pups as that needs to be done a little later, I think around 8 weeks, someone else will need to tell you the real age as my baby still has her natural ears and my vet never even mentioned cropping as I am sure they don't do it anymore. Anyways good luck and hope you can get some help...