Please help me understand my boxer!

[Diana]

Our boxer, Sadie, is a VERY sweet puppy (10 mos.) and wouldn't hurt a fly. She is so good with our 4 yr. old and loves to give slobbery kisses.

Here's the deal...

Whenever my husband and I are sitting down in the family room she will always come up and BARK at us. It doesn't stop! She looks directly at us and BARKS. We will put her in the laundry room for "time out" for 30 seconds, but shortly after she will get up and do it again. We also tried giving her a spray of water with the spray bottle, but she now thinks of it as a source of drinking water and sits and drinks the water as we spray her. We have ruled out "bathroom" and "hungry". We are not sure if she just wants to play constantly. It's getting to the point where we can't just sit and relax on the couch anymore!

In addition to this, she often will come up and growl or howl and try to grab at our hands. It's funny though because she'll sound really vicious at times, but when she grabs our hands or feet (whatever is hanging off the couch at the time) with her mouth she doesn't even bite down. Instead, she just gets it her mouth enough to slobber on them and get our attention.

Could this behavior be a sign that she wants to play constantly?

HELP!!!:(

 

[Seminolefan]

I have found that majority of Boxers are VERY jealous. She probably just wants attention from both of you and won't allow the both of you to pay attention to one another. King and Queen used to jump up in bed with us and wedge themselves between us! I wish I knew how to make it stop!!! Good luck!

Heidi, King, and Queen

 

[Tulsa-Dan]

The dog is demanding attention in the way he knows how to get your attention. Dogs don't know from good or bad attention, but barking gets you at LEAST to get up and put him in his crate for a time out, then released and you probably give him attention after that. He got what he wanted and he manipulated you all the way. You've just been trained.

Completely ignore the dog when he does this. DO NOT GIVE HIM ANY ATTENTION WHATSOEVER. No bad dog, no time out, no water bottle (that's only a game to many boxers), they think everything is a game once they have your attention.

If you DON'T let the dog have what he wants by displaying improper behavior, after a while he gets it and stops trying to get it that way because it doesn't work. Oh he'll try other things, but again, if you CONSISTENTLY ignore the dog (no eye contact either) he'll give up those behaviors and lie down and leave you alone. THEN you can call the dog to you after he's relaxed for about 5 minutes and give him lots of attention. But NEVER when he demands it. Only when it comes from you, at YOUR request.

Good luck.

 

[DixieDiana]

My Dixie barks and fusses at me when I am on the computer, if I don't let her stretch across my lap while I am online....she is jealous of the computer!!
As long as I let her have her way for awhile....she finally gets tired of standing on her back legs and stretching across my lap....then she will lay at my feet.

As far as her grabbing your hands or feet....even in a playful way....Don't allow it!!
What is just fun and playful now....can turn into a real problem later. It can even turn to biting.
I worked for a Vet for a long time and I have seen it happen time and time again.
You really do need to put a stop to her doing that now.
I am not trying to tell you what to do....I only want to help you with something that could turn nasty later.

Best Wishes to you!!

 

[newark]

Originally posted by Tulsa-Dan
He got what he wanted and he manipulated you all the way. You've just been trained.

LOL, Tulsa-Dan, when I read this I almost cried laughing so hard. It's been something that I had to learn about the hard way, as I've never had a dog to train before Jersey, so I've been careful after our first few mistakes, to make sure I'm the one doing the training, instead of 'getting trained'!

 

[gasach]

Diana, I felt so sad when I read your message that I just had to respond, this being my first posting on this forum , having just looked in for a long time.

I have lived with Boxers for nearly 40 years and currently have four. Never have my dogs behaved in such a way, sure they can be jealous and demanding of our attention. However when told to go away, lay down or whatever, then that is what they do.

Your dog is obviously demanding attention , probably from the person that she spends most time with, jealous that a relationship excludes her. More importantly she doesn,t seem to understand her position in your family pack. Something that I would be concerned about if I had a young child, even though the dog loves the child at present.

Forget spraying water and ' modern 'advice like that,start by asking why your dog doesn't do what you tell her to, for she obviously doesn't. My guess is she is not obedient in many ways.

Who is the dogs leader ? a young Boxer needs to know who is the boss and that person needs to teach the rules, so the dog knows what is expected. When she starts barking at you , 'the boss' says 'no' 'go away' 'down' or whatever. My dogs know that 'NO' means whatever you are doing 'STOP IT' and they do.

Your problem is not, why does Sadie bark, but why does she not do what she is told. The answer is very simple, she does not respect or know her leader, for if she did she would not be causing you a problem when you sit down to watch TV.

I wish you and Sadie good luck

Tony
England

 

[Diana]

Sorry for the long response, Tony, but I felt somewhat uneasy after reading your response. :(

Sadie is an obedient dog when it comes to other situations such as 'leave it', 'off' and similar commands. The ONLY time she is not obedient is when it comes to this one situation I mentioned.

My husband and I both give her commands and I do believe she knows we are in charge because she listens to the commands we give her (like I said, except in this one situation).

I have learned that when a dog tries to "hump" (not knowing any other term to use) certain individuals it is because they are trying to show their position in the pack. She NEVER tries this with my husband and I but she does try this with our 4 year old. Sadie tends to act as if she is her 'mother'. She does things such as leading me to her bedroom door if she hears her crying or standing over her when we put her in time out. I do believe that Sadie feels as if she is my daughter's protector and I am not sure if this status would put her above her in the pack. I do know that she has NEVER done anything to make us feel worried about her being around our daughter. Again, it is my husband and I who reprimand Sadie, not my daughter.

My husband also is the one who plays with Sadie the most. He is also not home all day long. Sadie does the barking thing more to him than to me. In fact, she never does it to me when he is not around. Knowing that he is more of her playmate than I am and that he is not home all day to see her, I thought maybe she wanted his time and attention to play.

I am also taking into consideration that she is still a puppy and full of energy. Also, that we are still in the training process with her. Then again, this has been my first boxer and, Tony, I know you stated that you have had them for 40 years. Could it be that she just hasn't learned all her commands yet considering her age? Or do you really think that we have this vicious dog on our hands that we should really begin worrying about?

If you read the other responses to this post, it sounds to me that I am not the only one who has experienced this behavior in their boxer before.

I have had a dog (not a boxer) before that had serious mental issues and had been through a lot in his past. I ended up having to give him away to a rescue organization out of fear for my daughter. Believe me, Sadie DOES NOT have any of the characteristics that dog did. In fact, I remember mentioning to my husband just the other day how nice it was to have such a sweet, loving dog this time.

As of right now, time out is starting to work, because when she comes out, she no longer barks and just lies down instead. But it has not yet stopped future episodes. I would appreciate any other information that anyone has about steps in stopping this behavior (training methods, etc.) and thank you to those who have already shared.

 

[gasach]

Diana, I apologise for my posting making you feel uneasy, this certainly was not my intent.

In no way do I feel that you have a vicious dog on your hands, indeed with your evident love and concern for Sadie I'm confident she will turn out to be a wonderful Boxer.

I was drawn to respond to your posting because of my love of Boxers and my despair at seeing so many being consigned to rescue centres because of bad behaviour that was both predictable and preventable, even though most owners 'loved' the dogs.

You will of course appreciate that dogs are individuals with their own characteristics, making it impossible to diagnose behaviour problems without knowing the dog, one can only suggest possible causes.

Sadie is not really a puppy any more, and her brain has already absorbed most of the lessons that will determine her success or otherwise at existing side by side with humans. ( remarkable creatures these dogs ). The good news is if she has picked up some bad ( by our standards ) habits, she is probably clever enough to relearn what is expected of her.

Believe me , she has LEARNT to bark and growl at you, whilst disrupting your evening of relaxation, dogs learn by doing, and being allowed to do.

Your problem is that your dog chooses to disobey you. Which poses the question, where is the leader, for in animal packs a leader would rarely tolerate such unacceptable behaviour, and the young culprit would cease misbehaving and happily fit into pack life.

The choice is yours, look for a magical solution or go back to basics




Regards Tony

 

[boxermom5]

When Sadie is doing this, are you and hubby just "sitting" on the couch or does she seem to only bark when you are more "snuggly" (as you mentioned 'whatever is hanging off the couch at that time'?

Tenaia is very much the "mama's" girl and has no problem voicing her discontent if I hug one of my children or if Tess is laying closer to me than she is. She will even go as far in staking her claim to me as to actually sit right on top of me with her face right against mine, just like a 2 year old child during those "no, mine" phases. I, of course, politely explain to her that she couldn't possibly get any closer unless she wanted to be IN my skin (desperately trying NOT to laugh at how cute her little "oh, pitiful me" look is, and make her go lay at the end of the bed. Generally, this requires a pretty good shove on my part and almost always is followed with that huge boxer sigh and funny little grumbling noise she makes when she doesn't get what she wants.

I agree with Dan - you've been trained, but the good news is you can still undo it. Sadie certainly has not become so old that she can't learn not to do this. My daughter had to do a book report on a 'how to' book, part of which was a show and tell demo of what she learned. She chose to use Tess (who was 5 at the time) as her project on dog training - and for those who say boxers are impossible to teach - Tess learned several new commands - with the coup de gras being how to roll over, in just a few days with complete consistency, and despite the distraction of a serious preferance to play and slobber all over 36 kids in the classroom, she performed her commands on the first request and got an A (so it can be done, even by a kid -mine was 11).

Good luck. Just be patient and persistant and you will get the desired result.

Jen, Tess & Tenaia

 

[Diana]

Thank you again for both of your responses. You are right, boxermom, when you asked if it was when we were snuggly. That's just it! Anytime we show affection to one another while just sitting there she does this.

I do know that she can undo bad habits because we did allow her at first on the couch and on the bed, until we figured out she was taking it over as "hers". Once we realized that we got her a really comfy bed (and 4 others since that first one) and now she knows that the couch is not hers nor is our bed. Every now and then she'll try us and jump up to lie there, but once we tell her OFF she listens and jumps down onto her bed.

These dogs definitely like comfort! We continue working with her and hope to also undo this learned behavior as well. I will keep you posted and will try all of your suggestions.

Thanks again everyone for the responses!