Please help, I love him so much

[luvmypup]

I purchsed Tucker 3wks ago from a breeder in Georgia. We had a trainer come to the house today, because we've been having a hard time training him. I read Culture Clash and the Dog Listener, and nothing seemed to work.

The trainer came today, and things are not well. It's hard to write this because I am histarically sobbing, but I didn't know what else to do. Tucker is 12wks old. He has been growling, biting, humping people that come to the house, (including children), and leaving very small spots of urine everywhere, especially by his food. The trainer did lots of temperment tests, placing him on his back, touching his toes, telling him no - and he just growled, bit. and barked. She told us he has a major dominance and aggression problem. She spent about 2 1/2 hours with him, and things just got worse. She said if not properly trained, he's the kind of dog that grows up and attacks. She told us if we kept him, she'd work with us, and it's managable, but he will never be the kind of dog that's good around children.

I'm 25, I've been married 6mths, we're closing on our first house next month - I thouht we'd get a dog, that would be a joy to us, and adore our children when we have them. I am in one word devistated.

The trainer said if we call the breeder, even if she takes him back, she'll either put him down, or sell him to another family who will eventually have the same problems. She suggested either we not have kids, and work training this dog for the rest of his life, or find a person that owns boxers, that doesn't have children.

Please help me - I don't know what to do - I can't remember what life was like before Tucker, this hurts so much. I know now I got Tucker from a back yard breeder, and I know in my heart the trainer is right. He is very aggressive and "talks back" when we tell him "no" he just comes back stronger and harder. I don't know how to help him, or what to do, and I can't stop crying. Please help - does anyone have any ideas?

 

[jeepinboxer]

I dont really know what to say as far as what to do but I am sorry this has happened. I wish there was something that could be done to have your pup all better but this sounds like something that is going to be a little more in depth than that. Have you brought your pup to the vet, maybe he is sick and is grouchy, maybe he has something wrong internally like a tumor, I hate to say that but I am trying to look at all the possibilities that might help you out. I heard of a boxer I think it was on here that attacked his mom after years of being together. He never acted that way but then turned on his mom after like 5 years and it was all because of a brain tumor. Also I wouldn't give it to another boxer owner unless it was going to be their only dog because if he is aggressive and territorial he might hurt their boxer and that is not fair to them. I don't know what else to say but my heart goes out to you, I wish there was more I could do to help.

 

[Billysmum]

If this trainer is prepared to work with you and Tucker than I would take her up on that offer.

What about getting a second opinion from another trainer?

Maybe when you get him neutered he will calm down a little.

I really hope you can resolve this and keep Tucker, because it's not really going to do him any favours if he is passed on and perhaps on again.

Good luck.

 

[ljnash]

Personally, I would get another opinion from another trainer. The puppy is only 12 weeks old. I just think you need to get the right training method (positive reinforcement) to deal with your dominant pup.

My Samantha is dominant, and I had problems with her when I got her at 4 months, but she and I had training, and she got so much better! I abandoned the methods I used that caused her to react to me with biting and snarling.

All this training takes lots of time and patience and consistency, so try not to be upset right now. I also hope you can resolve this now. It would be sad for the pup to be passed around and never get the training he needs!

Lenore

 

[luvmypup]

Yes, he's been to the vet 2 times already. He went just for a check up when I first got him, and then he climbed a baby gate, and pull his shoulder muscle, so we went a second time for x rays. I called a friend of mine that breeds and shows cockers. First she yelled at me for not going through her to find a breeder, then she recommended another trainer. My husband is currently crying, laying with Tucker, so we'd both be crushed, if we had to find him a new home. I was crying so hard when I posted this, I guess I misspoke the first time. I meant to say someone that had already owned boxers, and new the breed better than myself and my husband. My father, (who lives locally) feels so bad, he started calling trainers for a second or third opinion, and offered to pay I am going to call Tuckers breeder, I'll keep you posted. Thanks for listening.

 

[Zanes mom]

As others suggested get another opinion, and I would try to find someone who specializes in boxers - that may not be easy. One of the trainers I used had 2 boxers so he was familiar witht he breed and it helped having someone who new what they are like "high energy"

I was in tears several times with my dogs behavoir especially when he was a very young puppy it is so frustrating because you love them, and you do everything you can to train them and they still have unbeleivable will power. one of the puppy classes I brought Zane to the lady was horriffied at how aggressive he was at only 16 weeks old, she said he was giving mixed signals, he was acting playful yet his haunches were up and that was "suspect" relating to his temperment. As I got to know my dog I realized that anytime he is frightened or excited in a positive manner this happens, that is just how he is. He is still quite a handful, but I have had more than one trainer since the first tell me that he is just an alpha and it will take awhile to break him of it, and it will take consistency. I would stick with it, and definately get another opinion, get a few and then make a decision on what to do Good Luck!!

And also I would be suspicious if the trainer thinks he is so bad, why is he/she so anxious to work with the dog risking his or her own safety with such an unpredictable dog???

 

[shannonmac]

with him being only 12 weeks old I think there is still a lot of hope for you guys. I had a bit of a dominance problem with kneesaa. she would jump on my little step brothers and nip at them.
I began using timeout with her and if used consistently it works.
you may find that you are putting him in time out a lot. but they do learn that if there bad that's where they go and its no fun b/c mommy and daddy aren't there. just make sure its a place where there are no toys, nothing fun. we use the bathroom and say "TIME OUT" very sternly to her. she's almost 2 now, and if you say to her "you wanna go in timeout" shell stop what she's doing and lay down.
if you want to pm me feel free. I'm no expert, I just know from experience with kneesaa

 

[TracyLynn]

Is your trainer a certified behaviorist? I would be learly of anyone who gave a dog such a grim prognosis at only 12 weeks. Boxer are very vocal when they play and all puppies "bite." I have a dog who is not good around children and she was an absolute angel of a puppy. I also have a dog who loves children and he was a more difficult puppy. Contact a certified behaviorist in your area before doing anything rash. Since you have an eye on the situation early then you should be able to train these behaviors. Also have complete work up by a good vet to rule out any medical issues. Tucker sounds like a crazy boxer puppy.
He sounds like any normal puppy who wants to play rough, not be told he can't do something, and needs some soft bite work. Also - socialize, socialize, socialize... Oh yeah, socialize!!!

 

[Tulsa-Dan]

Personally I think the trainer who gave you that "advice" needs more work. First of all, what you describe is pretty typical behavior for an untrailed boxer puppy of 12 weeks old. I don't see any "aggression" or anything else that would indicate that the dog would not be good around children or would grow up to attack people. That's hogwash!!

Yes, boxer pups are very rambunctious. They bite, they talk back, they growl at you and bark at you and are very, very vocal and physical. That's the breed. Your "trainer" obviously knows little or NOTHING about boxers to make that kind of assessment.

Training takes TIME and PATIENCE. Pups have a whole new world to explore and they can't wait to get at it. They don't have time to learn tricks or commands, they want to bite, chew, taste, smell, explore, dig and do all the things their little dog heart's desire. Totally normal. Since pups have such short attention spans you can't expect them to be "trained" by reading a book and applying some or all of those techniques in a matter of THREE WEEKS !!!! My gosh! Give yourself and the puppy a break here!

You said you read the Dog Listener. If you did, then you know it takes a good 4 weeks for the bonding to take full effect, if applied consistently and properly. You're not even at 4 weeks yet. AND, you're dealing with a puppy, not an adult dog whose been through some training and understands the process.

As for your "trainer's" temperment tests -- I don't think putting a dog on its back would result in anything but resistence from any dog. It is not a method I recommend or use to determine a dog's temperment. That too is outdated hogwash. If she isn't a certified behaviorist, she has no business at all doing temperment testing on a dog. What are her qualifications?

This gal is just after your $$, I'm afraid. And as a "trainer" I wouldn't trust her with my pet goldfish!

First, you need to enroll the pup in some puppy classes. Get the dog socialized and some instruction on how to deal with the typical puppy issues you MUST deal with. They are puppies and we all have to go thru the nipping and jumping and all that stuff. Get used to it and get over it.

Then enroll in obedience classes. They will help you enormously in learning to train your dog properly and effectively. A personal trainer is fine if that's your preference. But get one who uses positive reinforcement methods ONLY and one who knows something (at LEAST something) about boxers.

Yes, a puppy is frustrating and a LOT of work. But, the good thing (and bad) is that they are only puppies for a short time. Inside a year, if you work hard, you'll have a wonderfullly behaved boxer who adores you and your family and will be able to handle a new baby if that is what you want. Boxers are highly intelligent and trainable. They can be awfully stubborn and go thru some very difficult stages (adolescence), but they turn out to be incredible dogs for the most part.

My best advice is to relax. Take it a step at a time and don't expect your dog to just become well behaved by itself. It takes time, training, patience, and a LOT of love!!

Best of luck.

 

[VTbxrFan]

Please take Tulsa-Dan's advice. The longer you stay on this board, the more you'll see that he really and truly knows what he's talking about. (I just wanted to mention that since I see that you are relatively new on the board and don't know much about anyone here yet!) Your puppy is very young. It's really sad to me that a "trainer" would make such harsh, definitive pronouncements about a puppy that young. Give it time and patience and follow Tulsa-Dan's advice. This is just a difficult puppy phase you need to work through - it doesn't mean you have a terrible dog. Good luck to you!