Peeing on my bed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[The_Layton's]

I really need some advice. I have been having problems with my boxer since I got her with potty training but tonight we reached a new low. I was giving the kids a shower and she wanted to be in the bathroom, I told her "no" and took her to the livingroom and told her to "stay". Not 2 minutes later I looked over into my bedroom to see her squatted on my bed peeing staring right at me. I am at the end of my rope with her. The back door is open all day so there is no issue with her not having the ability to go out. But I really feel she is trying to show domanance over me. It was my side of the bed and she rarley misbehaves when my husband is home. I think she is trying to establish herself as the alpha female. So I am sure you are wondering how I dealt with the situation, I screamed at her drug her off my bed all the way to her crate. She has gone from what was supposto be a good family pet to a major pain. Is there anyone out there who has dealt with this? Can someone please give me some advice? If there was a problem with her accessing the "potty area" this would be different but she does potty outside and the fact she was staring at me while she peed on my side of the bed tells me she was lashing out because I would not allow her in the bathroom during the kids shower. Thanks in advance for any help. ~ April

She is always trying to go out the door first infront of everyone, and last time I stopped her she started walking around my daughter in circles with this frantic look.... I really bothered me...I dont know any advice would help.... I am not sure what to do about her, I love her but it is getting out of hand. When I walk her she drags me but she behaves perfectly for my husband......Okay I am ranting now, thanks again.....

 

[rog1006]

First of all, take a deep breath, we've all been there before and we KNOW how frustrated you are! This IS a behavioral issue that can be resolved so there is certainly no need to even think of rehoming her. She is UNTRAINED and she can't just "know" what to do or not to do. Because you are far away, I would get online to AMAZON and get two books and start reading asap! The Dog Listener and Culture Clash are both excellent tools for training. If I were you, I would keep and eye on her 24/7 until you know she's trained. When I have untrained dogs in my house, I keep them by my side at all times-no exceptions. Secondly, if you use the crate as a punishment, you are sabotaging yourself. The crate should only be a good, happy, fun place to go, never a BAD DOG place. Then when you leave, she'll associate it with being bad, etc. Stop that immediately! There are many many threads on here reagarding dominance, training, etc. Order those books and then start reading on here for more info!

PLEASE give her a chance....once you get over these humps, you'll be amazed that you even considered giving such a sweet girl to someone else.

Christine
Boxer Luv Rescue

 

[Rocco850]

First of all, take a deep breath, we've all been there before and we KNOW how frustrated you are! This IS a behavioral issue that can be resolved so there is certainly no need to even think of rehoming her. She is UNTRAINED and she can't just "know" what to do or not to do. Because you are far away, I would get online to AMAZON and get two books and start reading asap! The Dog Listener and Culture Clash are both excellent tools for training. If I were you, I would keep and eye on her 24/7 until you know she's trained. When I have untrained dogs in my house, I keep them by my side at all times-no exceptions. Secondly, if you use the crate as a punishment, you are sabotaging yourself. The crate should only be a good, happy, fun place to go, never a BAD DOG place. Then when you leave, she'll associate it with being bad, etc. Stop that immediately! There are many many threads on here reagarding dominance, training, etc. Order those books and then start reading on here for more info!

PLEASE give her a chance....once you get over these humps, you'll be amazed that you even considered giving such a sweet girl to someone else.

Christine
Boxer Luv Rescue

I agree 110% of what Christine just said. I've read Culture Clash and it's great, definitley pick it up. She just needs training, time, and patience.

-Jenette

 

[The_Layton's]

Thanks

Thank you both for replying....I have to admit when I wrote that last night I was so frustrated I didnt know what to do. I realized last night she would require more training then I orginally thought. I am not just going to give up on her, she is a good dog in all other respects aside from this dominance thing she is trying to do with me. I suppose more then anything I was caught off gaurd by it. She comes from a kennell that breeds for temperment, I assumed that by spending the money we did that we would get a perfectly tempermented dog......I realize now I was kidding myslef. I wrote the owner of the kennell and she says Maab is a rare case usually her dogs are very sumbissive and do not try to assert themselves over their owners. As for the crate, do you have any immediate suggestions? I have ordered the books but shipping here takes a while so in the meantime, what do you suggest? Catching her in the act and shocking her dosent seem to work, I tried tying her out after she peed in the house and that didnt stop it either. The strange thing is she is house trained, she only does this when she is mad at me for not letting her have what she wants. (aka she wanted to be in the bathroom) And could you clarify what you mean by she is not trained? Do you mean house trained or obediance trained? Thanks again to both of you, I really appreciate it.

 

[Cami]

I understand that you reacted "in the heat of the moment" but now that it is over you have to realize that your girl must not be 100% potty trained. Just because she has an open door to the outside does not mean that she realizes that going outside to potty is the absolute perfect and only place to do it. You missed a great opportunity, instead of putting her in the crate you should have taken her outside immediately to let her know that outside was where she should go. Hindsight is 20-20 and I am sure that you will do better next time.

As far as her wanting to "get back at you"....I don't care how often I hear this IMO, a human is the only being that is capable of this behavior....certainly not a dog. I truly don't believe that they are wired that way. I would tend to think that in this situation, yes, she did want to be in the bathroom with you, was not permitted, had to go potty, (is not fully potty trained), went pee where she was when the need hit, did so and was still close to you. Just because it happened to be on your side of the bed tells me nothing. She had to go and was there......she could still see you... justs shows you that she is a typical Boxer, she loves to be with her family.

As far as her not misbehaving when your hubby is around....training has alot to do with timing. Perhaps during his training with her it was better timed? They do tend to know who will let them get away with what. This isn't something that they just know, it is a learned behavior. Oftentimes it also can be fear.

The running out of doors in front of you. There is a whole lot of excitement outside for them. Most Boxers are excitement junkies, they live in the moment and I am sure that your girl is no exception. They are great dogs, with loads of energy, most are high maintence but with lots of training and love they will grow to be wonderful additions to their families.

The books will be great training tools for you. You have to be patient and persistant. Seemingly the training aspect of owning a pet never stops. Just because we assume that they have learned everything that we have taught them does not mean that they don't require refreshers....daily. It's all part of loving them and wanting them to be the best dogs they can be. They build confidence as they learn and it can't stop.

Like another poster said, take a breath. We all make mistakes. It's part of life.

 

[BeckyNC]

I'm no expert, but it does not sound like your doggie's trying to dominate you or establish herself as the alpha. The running out the door before everyone else is probably out of excitement. The peeing on the bed.....well, she could have been nervous, she could have been excited, or she just might have needed to go and no one was paying attention to her signals. Does she normally go out on her own to potty since the door is open or do you need to be nearby?

My girl has peed on my bed twice, so I totally understand your frustration. She was 16 mos old the first time and about 17 mos the second time. It was my fault for missing her signals. One of the times she was also looking right at me when she did it. I interpreted it as her way of saying she knew it was wrong, but she had to go and I wasn't paying attention. Now, I pay very close attention to Tae's signals and plan to bell train her if I can ever find a bell.

I realize your situation is a little different, but don't give up on your girl!

 

[tcarlisle]

I would train three things -- continue potty training, train her that she is not allowed on the bed at all, and continue obedience training. I think it could be a female dominance issue, and training those things should nip it in the bud.

Your bed is recognized as the best sleeping spot for the leader, and she may have been marking it as her territory. I would not chalk it up as a potty training accident.

Of course, you have top clean the scent off the bed completely because it is now marked.

Other than using the crate as a punishment tool, I don't think you did anything wrong in your handling of the specific incident. I don't typically support people for scolding a dog during potty training, but since this involves some dominance issues I think a little scolding is appropriate.

 

[lhsdavis]

I had a female boxer who did the same thing. Whenever she was mad or didnt feel like I was including her in what was going on she would pee on the bed. My female boxer now, who is almost 4, would have the same attitude. She wouldnt pee on the bed but she would go just far enough away from me but still see me, then squat and go, staring at me the whole time. She would get scolded, spanked, etc, but in the end it was something she ended up outgrowing(she was one hardheaded puppy). I think it was just a part of her being that certain age(terrible twos in dog years) and she was showing her stuff. My 2 year old daughter does things that I think are simular just to get the attention, like taking her diaper off and when I cant catch her, she'd pee on the floor. Both dogs outgrew it, I was just consistant about scolding, or whatever works to make your dog understand what they are doing is bad. My first female I couldnt time out her in the bathroom(like I have a few of my dogs), because she was claustophobic, but a good scolding got the point across. Usually with the boxers time away from the family(5-15 minutes), is enough to get the point accross that they are being bad. My boxers cant stand not to be the center of whatever we are doing.

 

[Rocco850]

As far as her wanting to "get back at you"....I don't care how often I hear this IMO, a human is the only being that is capable of this behavior....certainly not a dog. I truly don't believe that they are wired that way. I would tend to think that in this situation, yes, she did want to be in the bathroom with you, was not permitted, had to go potty, (is not fully potty trained), went pee where she was when the need hit, did so and was still close to you. Just because it happened to be on your side of the bed tells me nothing. She had to go and was there......she could still see you... justs shows you that she is a typical Boxer, she loves to be with her family.

I totally agree with Cami, she's right. Too many times people get animals confused with humans. I know its not a hard thing to do, but we have to understand that they are animals and they need us to guide them to do what is acceptable to us.
I also agree with BeckyNC and TCarlisle, they gave some great information.

She would get scolded, spanked, etc, but in the end it was something she ended up outgrowing(she was one hardheaded puppy).

Now this is something I don't agree with and neither does BW. We don't believe in any kind of negative reinforcement, its all positive reinforcement. It just takes time and patience. Watch her cues.
Our dog is a rescue and we got him at 9 months. It took us a good two months to housebreak him. We *never* used any type of negative reinforcement, you don't need to. Everytime we thought he was housebroken and gave him some slack, he'd do it again inside. Obviously he wasn't and it was frustrating. Now he's housebroken!
I'm glad you ordered those books. As soon as you read "Culture Clash" its going to be *much* easier to train her, believe me. Keep us posted.