My Rescue Boxer hates my son

[SueAndHerZoo]

Well, I'm not sure he HATES him, probably more of a fear issue. We rescued an abused, desserted boxer 5 months ago and he's now a gorgeous picture of health, but emotionally he's still got a long way to go. He is terrified of everyone except me but he's slowly getting better with hubby, neighbors, relatives, etc. However, my adult son who lives in this house cannot walk through the house without the dog barking viciously and twice even lunged and snapped. When my son is watching tv with my husband and I the dog is fine and will even lie close to my son on the couch, but when my son walks up and down the stairs, or God forbid in and out an exterior door, the dog goes crazy. This has been going on for the entire 5 months and if anything, is getting worse. It's so annoying and frustrating.... I thought it would get better with time. I've tried going over and hugging my son to show the dog that this person is not a threat - doesn't work. I've tried scolding the dog and telling him "NO" when he's barking at my son - doesn't work. My son has tried handing the dog treats..... only works if I stand right by the dogs side and go get the treat with him, and then he grabs it and runs.

What else can we do? Today I just tried ignoring it, but all the hair stands up on his backbone and he just doesn't stop til I raise my voice.

Suggestions?

 

[tesster]

Call a behaviorist for help. Situations like this typically don't resolve themselves.

In the meantime, you can practice counterconditioning to help your dog make positive associations with your son, instead of negative ones. Get some dried liver treats, cut up steak, sandwich meat, cheese, something REALLY enticing. Put the dog on a leash and have your son walk into the room, a safe distance away from the dog. The SECOND the dog sees your son, start giving him the treats and praise. Have your son exit the room and stop giving the treats. Then repeat. Practice this as often as you can throughout the day. Reserve the special treats for this training only. You are teaching the dog that when he sees your son, he gets treats. He will start making positive associations with your son's presence. It is most effective when you give the dog treats EVERY time he sees your son.

One thing to keep in mind is do not scold the dog for the way he reacts to your son. By doing so, you're inadvertantly teaching the dog that your son predicts bad things - getting yelled at by you. Redirect, block, treat. Whatever you can do to get him to calm down w/out making the experience worse for him.

It sounds like there are a few issues. He seems to be guarding you, which is an additional problem. I cannot recommend speaking with a behaviorist enough.

Also, for your son's safety, do not pressure the dog if you can see that he's getting overwhelmed. Don't back him into a corner. Always give him the flight option.

Best of luck!

 

[SILLY6PAK]

Can you make the son more involved. Have him be the one to give not only treats but all meals.
Rex liked Marked better when we first rescued him. I am now by far the favorite. I took Rex for walks and to his obedience classes. I am the dogs primary care giver so I guess Rex eventually decided I was O.K.

 

[catcrazy56]

Sounds like your rescue is afraid of your son a behaviorist will help I agree with silly6pak get your son more involved with your dog find out what your dog likes best wether walks or car rides and let him do it.

 

[SueAndHerZoo]

Thank you.... those are all wonderful suggestions and insight. I really needed to know which way to lean whenever this happens..... talking calmly and sweetly to the dog or scolding him, and now I see that neither really works. I used to try reassuring him whenever he barked that everything was OK but now I think that probably just reassured him that he was RIGHT to bark. I like the block, distract approach, and I really like the idea of giving him treats each time my son comes in or out of the house, even if I have to strap a bucket of meat around my neck!

I also like the behaviorist idea, but I have to wonder how effective that can be if my son isn't there, too? He works full time and then does online classes at night and goes to the gym 6 days a week so I don't see him coming with us to all the behaviorist sessions. Can they do anything for a dog without the "offending" party there?

I'm also confused as to why it's a bad thing for dogs to want to protect you..... isn't that a dog's nature? I know that some say if he considered me Alpha dog he wouldn't protect me, but I think he respects and obeys me, he's just showing his love by watching over me. Isn't he????

 

[Dempseysmama]

Call a behaviorist for help. Situations like this typically don't resolve themselves.

In the meantime, you can practice counterconditioning to help your dog make positive associations with your son, instead of negative ones. Get some dried liver treats, cut up steak, sandwich meat, cheese, something REALLY enticing. Put the dog on a leash and have your son walk into the room, a safe distance away from the dog. The SECOND the dog sees your son, start giving him the treats and praise. Have your son exit the room and stop giving the treats. Then repeat. Practice this as often as you can throughout the day. Reserve the special treats for this training only. You are teaching the dog that when he sees your son, he gets treats. He will start making positive associations with your son's presence. It is most effective when you give the dog treats EVERY time he sees your son.

One thing to keep in mind is do not scold the dog for the way he reacts to your son. By doing so, you're inadvertantly teaching the dog that your son predicts bad things - getting yelled at by you. Redirect, block, treat. Whatever you can do to get him to calm down w/out making the experience worse for him.

It sounds like there are a few issues. He seems to be guarding you, which is an additional problem. I cannot recommend speaking with a behaviorist enough.

Also, for your son's safety, do not pressure the dog if you can see that he's getting overwhelmed. Don't back him into a corner. Always give him the flight option.

Best of luck!

Excellent advice given. Seek a behaviorist's help- you need a professional to observe the dog and your son and their relationship first hand. Be sure they use positive methods only.

 

[SueAndHerZoo]

I understand everyone's advice, and it all makes perfect sense, so now I'm pretty depressed and torn about what to do from this point forward. One of my greatest thrills is being able to coddle and baby my pets, and it's never backfired on me like this before. Yes, we DO encourage him to come sit with us on the couch, and we do give him hugs and provide all the comfort we think he needs. I think the fact that he was so pathetic when we rescued him just adds to our wanting to make everything about his new life wonderful. He was emaciated, had an eye infection, ear infection, mange, wounds, etc. We then almost lost him when we took him in for neutering.... something went wrong and he didn't recover..... doc asked our permission to "go back in" after the dog wasn't coming around after surgery, and we found that he was bleeding out inside. It was touch and go for a few days,but he pulled through, so each time we look at this gorgeous picture of health now we can't help but hug and coddle him. He's SO AFRAID of people that it's painful to watch, so to be stern with him is SO HARD..... he is so eager to please and literally cringes when he thinks he might have done something wrong even before we say a word. And he DOESN'T do anything wrong - he's the perfect dog, except for barking at my son!

(sigh) I know you're all right.... I just have to find a good mix between fixing this problem while still being able to love him to death with cuddling.
Sue

 

[catcrazy56]

I also like the behaviorist idea, but I have to wonder how effective that can be if my son isn't there, too? He works full time and then does online classes at night and goes to the gym 6 days a week so I don't see him coming with us to all the behaviorist sessions. Can they do anything for a dog without the "offending" party there?

Maybe he needs more time to accept your son seems like he's busy and not around as much as you guys, or maybe he hasn't accepted him as him family yet?

He has been thru so much poor baby he must be so confused.

 

[SueAndHerZoo]

Yes, Cat..... it breaks my heart to think of NOT providing him tons of love and comfort after the horrendous life he's had. I think it's pretty understandable that he feels the need to be so protective of me and his "home" that he finally has..... He probably feels for the very first time that he HAS a home. I know that dogs need to be trained and learn their place in the household, but he's just a bundle of fear and trying to please.... he literally cringes 60% of his day, wondering if he's about to get hit for something he just did which can be as simple as walking by you. He's terrified of so many little things that you drive yourself crazy wondering what this poor boy has been through. He is TERRIFIED of flashlights, and TERRIFIED of crinkling paper of any sort (even the cellophane wrapping around cheese). Maybe something about my son reminds the dog of someone who beat him, so I guess the best thing to do is get my son to do more things with him. Thanks for your compassion.
Sue

 

[ELubas]

You have gotten a lot of good advice here so I don't have much to add but wanted to let you know that your love for this boy touches me and obviously you are the first person who has been kind to him-not surprised he bonded so with you and wants to protect you. I would get with a behaviorist anyway and see what they recommend. Better if your son is there but still can not hurt to get a professional's opinion. As an aside my boy used to go nuts when my husband went out the door and the behaviorist we used said the dog definetely did not view my husband as a leader plus your son is not around alot. Anyway best of luck and bless you for loving this boy