Today marks one week since my sweet girl has been gone. Thank you so much dozersmommy for the link. I'm sitting here at work with tears rolling down my face.
I didn't realize that I could ever cry this much in my whole life. Maddie's urn came in the mail yesterday. I had the hardest time opening the box with her remains in them to transfer her to her urn. It is the sweetest urn....it is a box with a boxer on top that looks just like my girl minus the gray face.:( I have made a shrine on the top of the piano with her urn, collar w/ tags, her baby pictures and a candle. My daughter and I decided that each Sunday we would light the candle in rememberance of her and say a special prayer.
I ordered pizza the other night and when I got down to the crust I think I had a major break down! I looks down to give Maddie my crust and she wasn't there. I bawled like a baby. She was crazy about the crust, I called her my pizza dog. I think pizza will be a food I will have to wait to order again!
Carson is having a really hard time without his buddy. He spends a good percent to the time crying and looking around the house. I look into his eyes and see how very sad he is. He's only played once since Maddie left. I spend a lot of time snuggling him and crying into his fur. Poor fella doesn't know what to do with the dumb human that is always cry all over him
To my sweet bestfriend, I miss you so much. Yes, I will always be your mommy forever and always. I look forward to seeing you in heaven and looking into those wise brown eyes and having a big stupid grin on my face. Until that day Maddie I will think of you daily and remember what a wonderful, special angel that you were. You touched my heart like nothing will ever again.
Bye my girl, until we meet again. Mom