I need help

[luvmypup]

I think I have overfilled my plate, and now I am just plain overwhelmed. I have a 3 yo son and a 2 yo daughter. Our older boxer turned 5 last month. In September we decided to add another boxer baby to our family as I have posted about before. We adopted a white female 6 wk old pup that was sent to be put down because she is white. We found out soon there after that she is also deaf. I am a SAHM, so I am always here, however, as often as I take her out, (which is almost every hour) she still has pee accidents in the house. She hates the cold, so dragging her outside is a chore, and I suspect she doesn't always pee, but instead cries at the door. She never pees in front of me, it always seems like she waits until nap time or bath time and sneaks away to go in the house.

She is a major counter surfer, and is constantly stealing the childrens food, and our food. She knocks empty dishes off the counter, breaks bowls that she thinks may contain food, and generally causes a ruckus. She is roughly 6 mths now. I cannot crate her because she FREAKS out. She cries the entire time we are gone, and vomits and urinates in her crate in our absense. I tried caging her in the kitchen using a gate that comes up past my waist, and she has figured out how to get out. There seems to be no way to contain her. When we go out now we double gate our stairs (top and bottom) and she stays downstairs. With 2 little kids there always seem to be toys laying around as much as I try to keep clean, and of course she destroys them. If the bathroom door is left open, she will steal garbage and dirty diapers and try to eat them. I am constantly running up and down our stairs after her. I try to keep her with me all the time, but she and Tucker ar always playing and are very loud and vocal.

Putting the kids to bed is hard because of her separation anx she cries for me and scratches outside the door. Keeping the kids awake. If I let her in their rooms, she tries to eat their toys. She has gone from being so cute with our 5 yo boxer Tucker to biting him and attacking him all the time in VERY rough play.

I belong to a cpl deaf dog groups, and have been using hand signals, but she doesn't seem to be getting it - she will only even sit when I have a treat, if not she ignores me. She jumps on the children, especially if they have food, or a toy she wants, and is all over our guests. I am tired.

To add to the craziness of our situation, I recently found out I am pregnant again, and now feel like I have 7 mths to get this undercontrol. Obviously we have taken on too much, and truthfully I have thought of rehoming her, however, she is our baby and our responsibility, and we obligated oursleves to her. I also want to set the right example for our children, that pets aren't disposable. I just can't continue on with no way to contain her or control her. I will take any advice!!!!

 

[JokersSoul]

Wow, you do have your hands full. I really don't have advice other than the fact that you have come to the right place to ask for it. I just wanted to respond to tell you that you are amazing for keeping her and taking care of her when no one else wanted to.

If you do end up having to rehome her, please know that you gave it a shot and that you had to do it for your sanity as well as keep a safe and comfortable home for your children.

Keep your chin up.

 

[Maxwell's Ma]

First of all congratulations!!! You know pups don't really get the housebreaking thing till about 7mos of age. So, give yourself and your pup a break. Hope you find a solution to these problems. Good luck.

 

[MyBoyChamp]

Champ wasn't fully housebroken until he was a year old. He was house broken of peeing in the house around eight months old when I finally broke down and got bells for the door. He just wouldn't alert me when he had to go out. Even though your pup is deaf, you can still bell train. One thing though is I would go out with her to make sure she is going to the bathroom.

Also, six months is when boxers start to get teenagerish (like that word?) and can generally misbehave and act like they were never trained at all. Is it possible to have a trainer or behaviorist come work with your dog?

I know you don't want to rehome her but caring for two young children and being pregant is no easy task. If you do make that decision, don't beat yourself up over it. She is still young and I'm sure very adoptable.

Take care,

Patty

 

[kayboxer]

I agree with the above poster about getting professional help for your pup. A behaviorist or a trainer who knows how to handle a deaf dog would probably help tremendously. Just reading your post makes me tired, I truely can't imagine what your house is like. Hang in there, and congrats on the happy news! appicon

 

[luvmypup]

Thanks for the responses. I did have a behavioralist come in already. She seemed to think Cesar Milan was a god, and was into pinning for domination, and use many very aggressive techniques that I don't agree with. As for a trainer, I have called 6-7 trainers in the area, and no one has any experience with deaf dogs, although a couple said they could "try". Perhaps I should try one of them. I have done so much research on deaf dogs, it almost seemed like I was educating the behaviorist when she came here. I guess I will continue looking. Thanks.

 

[SweetCody]

I would definitely have one of the trainers who said they would try come in. Even if only one suggestion helps just one behavior you are still better off than you were. She is also still very very young. So maturity will help all of this a lot. And by the time the new baby arrives she will be over a year and not quite as naughty as she is now just due to age. My Aniah is just like your little girl. She drives me crazy, sometimes to the point of me just breaking down in tears. But we keep trying and she is getting better. She listens for treats only, so we use treats as the main part of her training, and at least we can get her to listen now.

Good luck to you.

 

[WAT]

Your post winded me, you are a super-woman. Hang in there. Have you also tried any of the Boxer Rescues in your area? Perhaps they could give you some advice on training a deaf dog. I see quite a few deaf Boxers on our local Boxer rescue website, so they are probably more adept to dealing with the hearing challenged Boxer. Good luck to you and I hope everything works out for you.

 

[LILYLARUE]

I have a rescued pittie and having some of the same issues with you only I have 2 teen girls in the house instead of babies. I am going crazy too trying to keep up with her housetraining. I am thinking of rehoming her too, that is until this past weekend. It's like she all of a sudden "gets" what I have been so upset over the past 6 months. It was like she went on leave as far as training went. Now, no accidents in the house for a week.

If you feel overwhelmed now, get some help from a friend or hubby. You NEED TIME TO YOURSELF! You are NOT WONDERWOMAN! LOL Get away from the pups and babies and go shopping, or dinner or even just a cup of java at a cafe. Talk to strangers and NOT ABOUT YOUR DOGS OR BABES! Talk about YOU! And don't go home until you can take a deep breath without shaking.

I have been in that "it ain't gonna get better" stage for months and now when I finally want to give up on her, she turns around and changes my mind and turns into the most adorable, well behaved girl. In 7 months, things will be much more relaxed. She's gonna take longer because she is deaf, but that can't be a crutch for her. You can't allow that to be a cop-out for her or YOU. Deaf or not, she needs training. But being deaf does make it more difficult and a longer process but she will get it with your help. And hubby too don't forget. Even the kids can get involved in training. Now is a good time for them to learn as well.

Take a night to split duties. He can train and you can play with the babies. The next night, switch. But expecting yourself to take on all these responsibilities is just crazy. You can't do it all.

So take some time, split training duties, get out whenever you can to wherever you can and BREATHE! You are doing great, just feels like too much. You will be rewarded later. I know, hate to wait, but it will be awesome when it does become a settled down home.

I wish you all the luck and congrats on your news!

 

[LucNesbitt]

Wow! Saying you've got your hands full is an understatement. I'm 19 days away from my due date with my first child and I couldn't imagine having gone thru pregnancy with all of that going on!

As for the housebreaking, I'd try bell training. Even though she can't hear the bell, she can learn that ringing the bell signals you that she needs outside. If you need any instructions on how to do this, either search the forum or re-post and I'll tell you how we did it but for sake of trying to keep this from being a long post, I won't go in to the details.

Have you tried using NILIF (nothing in life is free) training with all your family members, particularly your kids? We went through some really rough patches behavior wise with Moab and the only thing that got us through it, beside patience and sheer willpower, was being very strict on NILIF for everything. He got nothing from us, not even a glance, if he was misbehaving. He had to sit calmly for food, his favorite toy, anything he wanted. When he was throwing a temper tantrum, I litterally would walk around the house staring at the ceiling & crying while he was growling, lunging, barking, grabbing my clothes, doing anything he could for attention and until he calmed down and sat, he got nothing from me, not even a vocal command. It was really rough and there were days when I was covered in bruises from his temper tantrums and attention getting behavior but NILIF was all he related to and now, he's an amazing dog and we don't have any issues in our home.

When you put your kids to bed, can you put up a baby gate of some kind so that she can see you, but not get to you? That might help the separation anxiety.

The behaviorist we worked with recommended a DAP (dog appeasing pheromone) collar or diffuser. Its the same pheramone a nursing dog releases to calm her pups and only affects dogs, not other animals or humans. We used a diffuser in the common area of our home for several months while we worked on Moab's behavior problems. When it ran out, I always knew b/c his behavior would start to regress and when I plugged in the refill, he'd calm back down within a few hours. We no longer need it but it seemed to really help during that difficult time. You can get them at petsmart if you want to try that in addition to training.

I can't recommend the services of a good trainer or behaviorist enough since the advice they gave us is the reason we were able to keep Moab and work through his issues. Once we started following her training program, it only took a few months for 90% of the issues to be resolved, some were even significantly improved within a few days / weeks. It was all positive reinforcement / NILIF so if you can find someone like that, they are worth the money!