I have been so stressed ever since getting a dog. He is alone during the day, because I work. And at night, sometimes I have to run errands and do not get home until 8 or 9 oclock. I have to either get groceries or do something. I just feel so bad all the time and so stressed out about it. My life does not even seem enjoyable anymore. Sometimes a friend will be like, come meet me after work, and I can't, because I have to go home to the dog. Am I too worried about him? Do you ever go out or just stay home because of the dog? please help.
Do I stress about leaving the dog alone too much, please help
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Laura McNamara
Boxer Booster
Since I am not home all day I try to get home as soon as possible to let Doc out and feed him. I know its not very fun for him to be in his kennel all day so the evenings are for him to have his fun and run around the house. If Doc is allowed to go where ever I am going he is definately coming.
rog1006
Completely Boxer Crazy
Hmmm....there seem to be quite a few threads touching on this topic lately...
How old is your dog? Where do you keep your pup when you're gone? When you say you might not get home until 8 or 9 at night, does that mean he is alone for the entire day and the night??
I will only speak for myself, so here goes. I am always thinking of the dogs and how long they have been left alone. Now, mine are crated during the day--I work from 9-5 and I come home for an hour for lunch and play with them. Then when I get home, my sister and I work out a tentative schedule about who is going to be home when. If she has to go out, I stay home and vice versa. Now sometimes it can't be helped and we both have to run out, but only for a little while. To me, they are my kids and I don't want them to be crated forever just because I want to run around and have fun. BUT these were things we both (my sister and I) considered BEFORE getting dogs. We chose to have them and love them so we take responsibility for them. So to me, if that means I can't go out with a friend, then I just deal. Most of the time, I work it out so I can bring them or if I want to hang out with a co-worker or friend I have them come to my house. Plus, I really ENJOY being with my dogs, so it's not like I feel bad about my decision! I feel bad that you are feeling so stressed, but maybe we can help you find some solutions...
-Christine
How old is your dog? Where do you keep your pup when you're gone? When you say you might not get home until 8 or 9 at night, does that mean he is alone for the entire day and the night??I will only speak for myself, so here goes. I am always thinking of the dogs and how long they have been left alone. Now, mine are crated during the day--I work from 9-5 and I come home for an hour for lunch and play with them. Then when I get home, my sister and I work out a tentative schedule about who is going to be home when. If she has to go out, I stay home and vice versa. Now sometimes it can't be helped and we both have to run out, but only for a little while. To me, they are my kids and I don't want them to be crated forever just because I want to run around and have fun. BUT these were things we both (my sister and I) considered BEFORE getting dogs. We chose to have them and love them so we take responsibility for them. So to me, if that means I can't go out with a friend, then I just deal. Most of the time, I work it out so I can bring them or if I want to hang out with a co-worker or friend I have them come to my house. Plus, I really ENJOY being with my dogs, so it's not like I feel bad about my decision! I feel bad that you are feeling so stressed, but maybe we can help you find some solutions...
-Christine
DixieDiana
Boxer Buddy
I guess the best way I can put it is....they are like children. And the best rule of thumb is to try your best to do for them, the same that you would do for a human child.
11Laura-
I understand where you are coming from. It can get quite overwhelming. I do promise it does get better but the guilt doesn't go away. You have to remember, there is a difference between being away at work and being gone for 12-14 hours or so a day. I'm not sure how old your dog is but it takes time and adjustments. They need attention and time. I personally come right home and bring C on my errands with me. I also only work part time so my situation is different than most. Sometimes he and I just have to "suck it up" and "deal with it" but the time is usually only 6 hours and I think I feel much worse than he does.
Have you considered doggie daycare or something like that for a few days a week to relieve some of your feelings and make for one happy and well exercised dog? Might work....
Good luck and I hope things work out for you. They are such a responsibility.
I understand where you are coming from. It can get quite overwhelming. I do promise it does get better but the guilt doesn't go away. You have to remember, there is a difference between being away at work and being gone for 12-14 hours or so a day. I'm not sure how old your dog is but it takes time and adjustments. They need attention and time. I personally come right home and bring C on my errands with me. I also only work part time so my situation is different than most. Sometimes he and I just have to "suck it up" and "deal with it" but the time is usually only 6 hours and I think I feel much worse than he does.
Have you considered doggie daycare or something like that for a few days a week to relieve some of your feelings and make for one happy and well exercised dog? Might work....
Good luck and I hope things work out for you. They are such a responsibility.
gordsan
Super Boxer
I too struggle with this - I find myself not making many plans during the weekday evenings as I feel guilty about leaving Mason alone. Fortunately I have tons of friends who love to come over and hang out with us, so I can have a bit of a social life! I also have friends who don't mind coming over and walking with Mason and I to the dog park and then we go to one of the restaurants nearby that have an outdoor fireplace and allow us all to sit and eat! I have given myself a bit of a break by hiring a dog walker, so I can run errands at lunch on the days she comes over. I also put him in daycare once a week and after that in the evening I don't feel guilty about putting him in his crate and going out as he is so exhausted he just curls up on his bed anyway!
I definitely do not do as much socializing now that I have Mason, but then it would seem I prefer his company to many people I know!
He is now almost a year old though, so I'm trying to do more at weekends - Saturday and Sunday morning will be for him - I'll go and run errands in the afternoon, we'll go to the park again in the late afternoon and I may go out again in the evening.
My life totally revolves around Mason and what is best for him - but then he has given me so much joy in return that I really don't mind! I still do suffer guilt though, and probably always will - especially with those big brown eyes staring at me!!
I definitely do not do as much socializing now that I have Mason, but then it would seem I prefer his company to many people I know!
He is now almost a year old though, so I'm trying to do more at weekends - Saturday and Sunday morning will be for him - I'll go and run errands in the afternoon, we'll go to the park again in the late afternoon and I may go out again in the evening.
My life totally revolves around Mason and what is best for him - but then he has given me so much joy in return that I really don't mind! I still do suffer guilt though, and probably always will - especially with those big brown eyes staring at me!!
Jaelle
Completely Boxer Crazy
When I had Pénéloppe at first, I was a little upset how my life suddently change. I couldn't anymore do what I want, I had to be home for the dog. And it was even harder, because she always been a very sick dog, since the last year it's with bad allergies, so I was very worried of how I will find her when I come home. But now, she is two years old, I'm not going out very much anymore, even if I work part time, but I have learn to enjoy at lot being home with my girl, so much that I just got another little boxer!!! They are a very important part of my life now, more important than many things I had enjoy before having them, they are my little bunch of love!!!:p
SweetGirlie1400
Super Boxer
Well now I feel better knowing that when i DO get a boxer I WILL have the proper time for him/her since I am a stay at home kinda person who dosnt need to go out often.. my time to go out is friday because I have a riding lesson, but If i wanted to I would even be able to bring my boxer baby as long as she stayed in one of the rooms :D I hate to say this, but I think I've always preffered the company of an animal because they really are your true friends, they cant talk about you behind your back (can think it but thats a whole new story 
) and they're always there for support and cuddles.... of course human friends are always important, but I wouldnt mind spending most of my time with a pet (thats just me tho )
) and they're always there for support and cuddles.... of course human friends are always important, but I wouldnt mind spending most of my time with a pet (thats just me tho )
adeinert
Boxer Insane
Here's my suggestion...
So that when you are away, you don't feel guilty...
Don't leave him for unreasonable amounts of time, that would make anyone feel bad for how sad he is.
When you are with him, do extra fun things. Long walks, trips to Petsmart, cuddling, rowdy yard play, dog park ...
Dogs are social, especially boxers. He just needs quality time with you. That's how I look at it for me. Sometimes I don't go out at night. They can't live in the crate. But sometimes, I wear them out and do go back out and do something for me. I believe in everything in moderation, being well rounded. You shouldn't feel like you are giving up yourself. Your baby should add quality to your life. :D
Good luck at balancing your life, they are now my life but I still do a few non-boxer things. :p
Ashlie, mommy to Jillian, Tulley the birthday boy, and Lily our baby foster
So that when you are away, you don't feel guilty...
Don't leave him for unreasonable amounts of time, that would make anyone feel bad for how sad he is.
When you are with him, do extra fun things. Long walks, trips to Petsmart, cuddling, rowdy yard play, dog park ...
Dogs are social, especially boxers. He just needs quality time with you. That's how I look at it for me. Sometimes I don't go out at night. They can't live in the crate. But sometimes, I wear them out and do go back out and do something for me. I believe in everything in moderation, being well rounded. You shouldn't feel like you are giving up yourself. Your baby should add quality to your life. :D
Good luck at balancing your life, they are now my life but I still do a few non-boxer things. :p
Ashlie, mommy to Jillian, Tulley the birthday boy, and Lily our baby foster
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