Rescue Pressure?

[JackDawg]

We are working with a rescue to find a second dog. We met with the foster family and the dog over the weekend. Their meeting was not as positive as I had hoped. They kept their distance did very little playing and she had several instances of growling/barking at our male. I did not take it that they were really "hitting off" and told the foster family that we would think about it and let them know. After some thinking, we decided it was not the match that we are looking for and let them know that we would not be taking her. The foster mom sends back an email stating that we need to commit to adopting... I feel we are committed, I just don't want to take the first dog we meet on a whim and hope it works. Are we in the wrong or is there something we are missing?

 

[caruse]

That doesn't sound right to me....why are you "commited" to taking that dog and why would the foster want you to take a dog that you feel doesn't "match" or "fit" with the dog you have....I say go with your gut feeling...you need to be sure it is a fit for both the rescue and you....
Barbara

 

[DiverDiva]

I don't think you are missig anything. By my read, you are committed to adopting, and that is why it is so important that the dogs like one another. Is it possible that the meeting looked different to the foster mom? Maybe the female dog growls and barks when she wants to play. That is what Oscar does, but only with his friends that he plays with regularly. Each dog is different, and maybe that is what this female does when she wants to get acquainted, but if you didn't feel positive about the meeting, took the time to think about it, and decided not to adopt her, I think that shows you are committed to finding the RIGHT one. Think about how much harder it is on a dog to be adopted, not get along with the first dog, only to be returned to the rescue and have to go through the whole process again.

When Oscar and I went to meet Mali, I was prepared to go home without her if they didn't get along. Luckily, it was love at first sight. lovicon

 

[BxrMommieNAZ]

Not every dog is for every person. Even within a breed every dog has their own personality, and IMO you are showing a lot of maturity, responsbility, and lack of inpulsiveness by meeting them, walking away, thinking it over, and then deciding that she just wasn't the right personality type for your other dog and your family. There's nothing wrong with that at all! I've fostered Boxers that were great dogs, but not a dog I'd personally want to keep forever. Sometimes things just aren't a match and IMO definitely do not let anyone pressure you into something you do not feel comfortable with. Go with your gut and make the right forever choice for you and your family.

Good luck!

 

[EAO76]

email stating that we need to commit to adopting

I would need to know more of what she wrote to understand her point. As a foster mom I have told many families that it isn’t a good match. I usually recognize it before they do. So I am surprised that she is pushing you to adopt if it didn’t seem right. However not every dog hits it off right from the beginning. Sometimes it takes time for a relationship to develop. Maybe she was trying to say that rescuing a dog is a commitment & that there is no such thing as a perfect dog. Maybe she feels you have unrealistic expectations and is trying to explain that there may be some challenges along the way and that you need to be committed enough to work through the kinks in the beginning.

 

[mugsymom]

Ultimately, you need to go with your instincts. It is wonderful you are being so careful...you would hate to have to rehome a dog after a sour adoption. DON'T adopt a dog if you feel uneasy about it in any way. Hugs and Good Luck! Aileen

 

[JackDawg]

Thanks for the feedback. You guys have confirmed my decision. Wish me luck as we continue our search...

 

[rhyswill]

We just recently rescued a 2 yr old male and introduced him to our two girls at our home. His previous life was so poor and his true inner beauty and outward personality kept him from being left behind for one single second longer. He was quite standoffish for the first 24 hours - the girls were very interested, but not at all aggressive. Rhed barked and Brhin whined, but all this was done in the "playful bow" stance and Blazed seemed very confused. Blaze had been around other dogs, as well as small children, but had no idea how to play, interact, play with toys, boxer burn, etc. The girls were very patient and persistent and now, only two weeks later, they are inseparable.

My point of this is, when you don't fully understand the "previous life" of a rescue dog, it becomes very difficult to know how they will react to new dogs, people, housing or any multitude of other variables. To better explain this point: the only two people Brhin has growled at since we got her (over a year ago) is my father-in-law and an older man in the vets office who had a very similar appearance to my f-i-l! She's telling me something about the previous life, right?

I will still agree with the others here - your gut has to be the best indicator... the foster may just be sincere in wanting to see the girl off to a better home - but she may know something else she's not telling you.

With all the boxers out there for adoption, I'm sure you'll find the "one". Best of luck.