1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

New addition troubles -Ponza snapped at my daughter...

Discussion in 'Behavioral Issues' started by cama, Apr 30, 2006.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. K8IE

    K8IE Boxer Insane

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2005
    Messages:
    3,167
    Likes Received:
    0
    I am really sorry for you all (and especially for Ponza) that you have had to come to this decision. I have been through exactly the same situation and still regret the decision I made to rehome our other Boxer years ago. This was before I really understood what I do now about dog behavior and before I found BW. Had I known then what I know now I would never have given Samson up without a fight (and a behaviorist's help.) He is in a good home with a friend now, but I will never really get past the feeling that I failed him and gave up to quickly. I say all this so you will know I am not judging you, I only want to let you know that there are options you can try before surrendering him to someone else.
    Like Gmacleod said, dogs will give warnings over time, and when they are ignored or unnoticed the behaviors they use to try to communicate will escalate. It sounds like you have made your decision, but I just want to tell you that should you decide to ever get another dog, you could be facing the same things all over again unless your children learn what are acceptable behaviors with dogs and what are not. My son is 6 years old and has been raised with our 9 year old Boxer, it took time and diligence, but he was taught not to hug, jump on, or do threatening things and I do trust my boxer as much as a dog can be trusted. But we have to realize, they are DOGS. As much as we may think that they "should know better" and should never snap or growl, dogs have boundaries, and when they are not respected, they will do things that dogs do to protect themselves. For anyone to safely maintain a household with pets and children, one must be unfailingly diligent, something that I learned the hard way, but I can say that learning the things I have learned from books and BW now I know what needs to be done for peaceful and happy coexistence. I am sorry I am rambling, but I know how heartbreaking it is to make a decision like this, I hope that everything works out, whatever you decide to do.
     
    Last edited: May 2, 2006
  2. Huggirl84

    Huggirl84 Boxer Booster

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2005
    Messages:
    144
    Likes Received:
    0
    Well, I just hope everything works out for you and Ponzo. I deal with agression issues myself I have just taught the children I nanny what is acceptable and what is not as far as handling the dogs goes. I understand your need to protect your children though and I just wish you guys the best.
     
  3. Sas'parilla

    Sas'parilla Banned

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2006
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    If you are not completely set on finding Ponzo a new home, I would suggest watching a show to see if any of that might help you (or even try his new book) Anyways..on the national geographic channel you can catch "The Dog Whisperer". I've seen similiar actions from other dogs that he was able to help with.

    No matter what you decide..my heart goes out to you!
     
  4. Louise501

    Louise501 Boxer Insane

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    4,458
    Likes Received:
    0
    I agree that children (if old enough) should be taught what is and isn't acceptable in the way they interact with a dog. I know I have spoken to my 2 boys 14 and 9, about it. I hope you maybe just try and even speak to a behaviourist before you let Ponzo go. Gmacleods advice was really great :)
     
  5. cama

    cama Boxer Booster

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2002
    Messages:
    104
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm touched by your responses...

    for me and my family. I haven't come back here for a few days because I was "waiting for the dust to settle" (so to speak) here in my home. Since this whole thing happened, I have been swinging from one emotion to the next, which has been trying and irresponsible on my part.

    By Monday afternoon, it was quite apparent to me that Ponza was totally back to his normal, happy, wiggly self. My husband and I have talked to the children repeatedly about behaving differently with Ponza, and I have watched their interaction with him this week. I have also relaxed. Again, my emotions were in total control in the last post. Bad, bad on my part.

    In the meantime, I had been searching for a new home for him (heartbreaking to say the least) - not just a new home or a good home, but the right home. Of course, no home is the right home except right here. Last night, my husband and I sat down and discussed keeping Ponza and what this would mean. It would mean 1) the kids have to learn new ways to interact with Ponza; 2) there will be no puppy or other dog in our home while Ponza is with us(even though I feel Ponza would settle down, the transition time while this took place would be too unstable), and 3) Ponza will have to be crated or put in our bedroom when the kids' friends are around or we have company or in any situation where he may be excited or stressed.

    This is going to be a learning process for my entire family, but I am relieved beyond belief and feel this is the absolute right decision. I don't want to look back and regret that we didn't give Ponza every opportunity to stay in our home. I hope and pray that I'll never have to come to *this place* in our lives again, and truly believe with dedication and hard work, we won't. Ponza is part of our family, and he's worth it!

    Thank you all again!
    Charlene
     
  6. Net45582

    Net45582 Banned

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2002
    Messages:
    147
    Likes Received:
    0
    Sounds like you have a good plan.....its something the entire family will have to adhere to,but the love of ponza will be well worth it.Good luck
     
  7. x19er

    x19er Boxer Insane

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2006
    Messages:
    2,097
    Likes Received:
    59
    Good luck I really hope you can all live happily together - keep us up to date on progress!
     
  8. K8IE

    K8IE Boxer Insane

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2005
    Messages:
    3,167
    Likes Received:
    0
    I am so happy that you are willing to give it a try with Ponza! I would hate for you to have to live with regrets and what if's, wondering how things would have worked out if you had tried to make it work. Please keep us updated and come here for support and with questions, I wish I had this support system (BW) when I was going through what we went through with Samson. Best of luck! :)
     
  9. Louise501

    Louise501 Boxer Insane

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    4,458
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh I am so glad...I am sure you can work it out, it will take time and effort from everyone but it'll be so worth it to keep Ponza :)
     
  10. terrip

    terrip Boxer Booster

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Messages:
    203
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was just reading through this thread. I am so happy that you are giving Ponza one more chance.
    I do know what its like to give a boxer away. Jasmine was my baby when I was 18. I soon found a boyfriend--we got married---had a baby. Then my baby girl Jasmine decided to go after me (I mean teeth showing) while walking down the hallway w/my newborn. I freaked---called my husband. He came home and we boarded her at the vets for a day. She then came home and I was scared of her now. She sensed it. Found her trying to get into the crib. We finally decided to give her away. Found a good home (I pray) and off she went.
    Well I have spent the last 12yrs wondering what hapenned to her. If she was a good girl, had a good life. I was young(23)---didn't think long term. Just went w/my emotions. I am glad you have talked and thought about things.
    This way even worse case you will know deep down you tried.
    I don't know that. I just feel bad. She was almost 5 when we gave her away.
    Its so hard---
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page