Need BW advice badly

[billbgh]

Hello all, I have a dilemma that I think you all may be able to help me with. Recently my dh was working(sales rep) and at one of his calls, there was a puppy roaming the streets. The people that owned the business said that it had been there for a while. When my dh went to leave(he'd made no contact with this pup whatsoever), it ran and jumped in his van. He called me up asking where the pound was, I told him and then asked why. He told me about this dog, and I emphatically told him NOT to take the puppy there. Long story short, he brought it home in hopes of finding it a family. Here is the dilemma. I would rather get Rocky a new home than this puppy. The pup is not a boxer, but just seems right. Rocky, while I love him, it took me a very long time to love him. He's almost 8 months old, he weighs 70 pounds, he knocks over my 3 year old alot, he's rude to Apollo, and quite frankly sometimes I am afraid of him. He's a gentle giant, he can be smart(although I think that he has ADHD, you know what I mean, he's a puppy), he's funny and he just loves to be loved. I have worked with him and he does well with the commands that he knows(although when he's super excited, he won't listen at all, and he sprinkles on the floor). Unfortunately, I have felt that Rocky wasn't right for a very long time. DH loves him way more than I do, but the other day, Rocky knocked 3 yr.old dd down and stood over her. We were both stunned that his behavior has started to deteriorate in the last month or so(in the sense that he does not want to acknowledge pack order) even though we all give him commands. If any of you want to berate me, then please do not respond, I am just looking for any advice that would be helpful please. I have made plans to foster the found puppy until we can find her a home, but don't know what to do otherwise. Thank you all in advance for your help.

Erin

 

[Indy's mom]

It sounds as if Rocky is starting to go through his teenage phase. He will need to push the boundaries, test the limits just as a human teenager while he is going thru adolescence. This may be a very short period, or it could be rather extended, until he is 2 or 3 years of age. It's simply part of living with a dog. Standing over your daughter is part of this, don't allow it, but please understand what is causing it. Having said that, it doesn't mean that it's time to let Rocky start running the asylum! :: It sounds as though you've put in a lot of work and are just now starting to reap the benefits. Keep up your good work, please!

Search the forums, particularly the training and behavior forums for NILIF, it stands for nothing in life is free. It will help you to bring your entire family into the training game with Rocky, especially your toddler. Rocky needs to know and understand that she is his pack leader and with your help he will. This can and will be a very positive experience for all of you if you work on it every day. Your little one will help to teach Rocky tricks, be the one to feed him, etc. As I said there is a wealth of information in the appropriate forums.

As for your little lost puppy. Only you and your family know in your hearts if you are the right home for him. If you are, bless you, but please be aware at some point he too will be an adolescent and will loose all of his charm. Good luck with whatever decision you make.

Good luck with Rocky, the good news is that his brain will be delivered back to him, I promise! gradicon Not exactly in a shiny bag with a bow, but it does come back, you will see results pretty quickly when you start working with NILIF. And sometime between the ages of 2 and 3 you will swear that someone threw a switch...what happened to my dog!?!?!? Oh he'll still have silly, ridiculous puppy moments, but you'll have a reliable, loving companion that you and your daughter will enjoy for many years.

 

[billbgh]

Thanks for the reply. I am appreciative of all of your support and guidance. Apollo has always been the perfect dog(except the teenage phase which was minor and his occasional getting set free-6 yr old dd leaving the door open for him), so with Rocky's new found dominance issue, it has kind of taken me for a loop. I will perservere with NILIF, we practice this somewhat(again, Apollo is great, Rock's just different) but not to the extent that we should. In regards to the puppy, she is so adorable, smart and sweet, but I honestly can't handle another dog. I am keeping her until the right home comes along however and will enjoy every minute of her. I also don't think that Rocky has lost his charm as a puppy or otherwise, he is just different than the other dogs that we have had and I am the one not dealing well with it(and the dominance). I hope that I have good news all around soon. Thanks again and thank you for being so positive

Erin
Apollo & Rocky's mom

 

[taryndanae]

I have no advice or words of wisdom, just wanting to wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide!!

 

[tastubbs]

Boxers are very exhuberant dogs, especially when they are young. If he is allowed to behave poorly, he will do it. You can train him, though. Don't give up! I survived training 3 and it's been worth it!

 

[LucNesbitt]

I can sympathize with your situation in many ways. Moab went through a stage where I was honestly afraid of him many times and he'd throw horrible temper tantrums for 20 minutes or so. If DH and I had had children when this was happening, I can't say that we wouldn't have seriously considered our options for surrendering him. I had horrible bruises and scratches all over my lower body from his jumping / lunging / pouncing on me to get attention. He had no impulse control and something as simple as not getting a pat on the head when he wanted it would set it off. At times, he'd grab my clothing and pull on it as I tried to walk away from him. Needless to say, it was not a pleasent experience.

But, this does have a happy ending. We sought a behaviorist for some anxiety based dog aggression issues and the best advice she gave us for these temper tantrums was NILIF to the extreme ... as in don't even acknowledge him with a look when he's not sitting down and being quiet. He's a completely different dog now. I can tell when he's getting frustrated and now, he'll sit himself down and wait instead of jumping up. He still has his moments, but they are few and far between. I can't tell you enough how much he's changed. It took a couple months but it was well worth it.

Check the behavior forums for information on NILIF, dominance, life stages, etc. You'll find a lot of good info. Also, realize part of this is a maturity issue. But regardless, everyone in your house must be strict with him. You might also ask your vet about a DAP (dog affecting pheramone) collar or diffuser. I won't go into details b/c I don't want to make a recommendation on whether it would work for you or not. You can google it or talk to your vet. We use one and it seems to help as well.

Best of luck to you ... I understand the need to stand outside and curse the heavens / scream / pull your hair out right now but it will get better!

 

[ELubas]

I can so sympathize with you. I love my girl, Nysa, very much, but she is dog aggressive and it has been such a challenge. My boy is so easy and my last girl was a particularly sweet soul, so Nysa has really tested me. Rocky is in a very difficult phase right now and probably will need a lot more management than your other dog. I know Nysa does! Whatever you decide I hope it works out for the best for you and your family and all the dogs. By the way, if you did decide to rehome Rocky that is not anything you should be ashamed of. You obviously love all the dogs and are doing the best you can-that is all any of us can do