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I might have to give Shankly up. Please Advise

Discussion in 'The Boxer Ring' started by Mikejo, May 14, 2002.

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  1. Mikejo

    Mikejo Boxer Buddy

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    Hi guys I've got a massive problem and I could really do with some good advice. We have had Shankly now for 2 years and she has always been a great dog who I love with all my heart. However on the 6th of March my Wife and I had our first baby and she is finding it very difficult to cope with the dog and the baby. She feels really bad on Shankly cos while I'm at work she cannot take the dog out for a walk, she feels she is being neglected. Its not such a problem when I'm working locally but with my Job I can be away all week just to return at weekends. As much as I love my dog I have to respect my wifes feelings and if she feels that she can't cope there is only one solution and that is to give Shankly up. This is something I would never think I'd hear myself say. I have thought about all the possible solutions i.e dog walkers etc etc but they are only make weights if I'm honest. If I was to have to give her up I wouldn't want any money for her I'd just want to be sure she was going to good home were she would be loved as much as I love her. My first point of call would be all the Uk members of Boxerworld. I really do think I'm grasping at straws now but please if any of you have any really good ideas please let me know.

    Thanks loads

    Mike
     
  2. vasha

    vasha Boxer Pal

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    Mike -

    What a hard decision to make! But isn't Shankly part of the family? Is there no neighborhood child that wouldn't appreciate a small payment in return for walking Shankly on a daily basis for you guys?

    I honestly DONT agree with your reasoning to give her up. My boxers are my babies and giving them up IS NOT an option for me. I'm also NOT in your shoes, so I can't and won't judge you or your reasoning. But to be COMPLETELY honest, you're situation makes me angry.

    If you feel that you MUST give her up. Here's a few links to boxer rescue in the UK that can help point you in the right direction. . .

    http://www.boxerrescue.co.uk/

    http://www.ukboxerdogs.freeuk.com/index.html

    http://www.norfolkboxerrescue.co.uk/

    Good luck with your decision!!

    lola snuggles n kisses lovicon
    kaiser hugs n slobbers foolicon
    VaSHa frogicon
     
    Last edited: May 14, 2002
  3. Sube Ru's mom

    Sube Ru's mom Guest

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    Mike-

    I have a question for you? if you guys had a 2 year old child and just had another baby would you give up the 2 year old child?
    why is it so easy for people to give away their dogs?
    are they not part of the family?
    i am not trying to critize or berate you, but i work in rescue, i have 2 rescued dogs and one of the most common excuses is, we just had a baby, we dont have time for the dog, so the dog has to go. do you know how often we hear that??
    did you guys think about having a baby when you first got your dog? or did you just want a dog and forget about the consequences?
    i would be lying if i told you that when i read your post it didnt piss me off, goes back to this being a throw away society, we can throw away the dog but not the kids.
    i know i didnt offer any solutions, but my advice is to REALLY think about giving up Shankly. you will not be the only one heartbroken from this, so will shankly and the new home she goes to will have to deal with her issues.
    If you do give shankly up, i hope you really consider it next time when you think about getting another dog.

    Dogs are a LIFETIME committment, not a few years!!
     
  4. vaboxer

    vaboxer Completely Boxer Crazy

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    What an awful situation to be in.

    I read a few different rescue sites a week...checking up on who's been adopted and wishing I could take on another dog...and I swear about half of the dogs that are givin up are for this reason and it hurts me so badly.

    The fact is...it is a behaivoral issue...of course Shankly is concerned with this new person in the house...the baby is pretty much taking his place...and by the looks of this post, Shankly has every reason to be concerned!

    Try getting a young person to walk him daily. Or maybe when your baby gets old enough for walks outside, that is the perfect way to lose weight brought on by pregnancy (or brought on by anything else for that matter).

    I would not have a choice...I would pay an arm and a leg to go to personal behaivoral classes to help my dogs understand my children if that should be needed...and no matter what, I believe I will always have time for a nice walk in the fresh air with my dog...and hopefully my babies one day :)
     
  5. trudy

    trudy Completely Boxer Crazy

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    Hey Mike -

    I also work in Rescue, I just got involved and was astounded to learn that one of the most common reasons people give up their dogs is because they just had a baby.....I can't wait till I can see my furbaby and skin baby grow up together!!

    I will ask you this BEFORE you really give up your first baby, I know that right now things are probably a bit nuts a baby is a HUGE adjustment for any couple to make, but is there no way you can find to keep Shankley. Why can't your wife take her out on walks?? Maybe walking the baby and Shankley could be part of her daily routine, okay so maybe she will need to be trained to walk with the carriage or whatever or neighboor hood kids could come and play with her etc..... Please rethink this decision.

    How awful are you going to feel when your little child asks you a few years from now for a puppy.....little will they know they had one. Shankley has a great opportunity to make a huge impact on your babies life, I believe you said Shankley is only two, her and the baby can grow up together...I know it all sounds very story book and is a lot easier said than done, but believe me all dogs that are sent to Rescue do not end up leading the story book lives either, some do, but not all....Give it some time things will quite down....I'm sure your wife is extremely overwhelmed right now feeling that she has to spread herself very thinly and okay maybe Shankley isn't getting all the attention that she used to get right now, but it's okay she knows there's a new baby...Time will bring Balance for everyone.

    Kiss Shankley and the new baby for me!
     
  6. khousman

    khousman Boxer Insane

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    If you don't already have a fenced in back yard, maybe you could put one up. I'm sure that your dog could get plenty of exercise running around outside and then you could take her for walks when you're home. We have 4 and there's no way that I could take them for walks by myself. I really hope that you could find a way to keep your first baby with you and your new baby.

    Kristi
     
  7. Ram&LexisMom

    Ram&LexisMom Guest

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    You could maybe crate the dog during the day while you are at work so that your wife does not have to worry about it? Then when you get home you can take the dog out to run and play. And on weekends you can run and play. I know its not the same, but when I take care of a friend's 6 month old, sometimes at weeks at a time, with 2 boxers I feel like I want to scream. I usually just let the dogs run outside for a little while. Lexus is content laying on the back porch for hours at a time. Or I will put the dogs in a kennel. And I want a baby SOOO bad. It was so fun to put the baby in a stroller when it was nap time and put the dogs on a leash and go walking. Sometimes I would load them all up in a car. I know your wife is frustrated, but give it a little more time. You dog IS a family member and doesnt want to leave so dont give up on it. Maybe there is a doggy dacare service??
     
  8. Aimee

    Aimee Boxer Insane

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    I'd have to echo all the thoughts here. Here's a scenario that gives hope...

    My sister has 4 children, all under the age of 6, 2 dogs, 3 cats, a guinea pig and several hermit crabs. She is a stay at home mom and also home schools her children. All the children and animals are taken care of and happy.

    It is a matter of your priorities. You've been given some great ideas. I am sure you can arrange a routine that fits your wifes schedule and makes Shankly happy too. Dogs do not readjust to new families as easy as people like to believe they do. Give it some time before making such a huge decision. Good luck.
     
  9. myrocky

    myrocky Boxer Insane

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    Why can't your wife play with Shankly inside while the baby is sleeping? Babies sleep all the time and this burns off energy just as well as a walk. They can play tug or fetch up and down a stair case. Both of those are great energy burners :D Get some chew toys and freeze some kongs for Shankly during the day to give her something to do with her time.

    What about taking the dog for a good walk before leaving for work in the mornings? Try and wear her out so she might be a little more calm during the day.
     
    Last edited: May 14, 2002
  10. Adelle

    Adelle Boxer Insane

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    I don't entirely understand why your wife cannot take the dog and baby for a walk together, but maybe we don't know all the facts involved. But if your wife cannot cope with walking the dog I would suggest a dog walking service, till the baby is a bit older and then perhaps your wife can fit a short walk into her daily routine.
     
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