I am so...grr...I need help (long)

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TossBranAbi

Boxer Insane
Not sure if this is right place, if not, please move to the appropriate location.

I just got off the phone with my niece, she called to give me the good news. She is getting a boxer puppy! Then...

She tells me he is being shipped from Oklahoma to Pennsylvania, he will arive at the local airport on Dec. 22nd. Do the airlines even ship animals this time of year? I thought it would be too cold. Kara (my niece) said the ticket was already bought. She then went on to tell me that the "breeder" is absolutely great. They found the puppies on puppyfinder. Kara thinks the breeder is great because she won't let the puppies go until they are 8 weeks old...duh! I told her they should be left there until at least 10 weeks and why, blah blah.
She then went on to tell me that the lady is taking payments because she didn't have all $700 upfront. Kara then went on to read me a note the breeder sent her. "The mother is a white boxer named Ashley, dad is a flashy fawn named Bubba" wait a minute...WHITE? I told Kara that she was getting ripped off, the puppies couldn't be AKC (I said this because she told me in the beginning they were) and she said they most definately were. Now you guys tell me this is a reputable breeder? Something fishy is going on.

I tried to tell her that she is doing the wrong thing. She keeps telling me she is so happy because this boxer looks just like they one they lost to cancer about a month ago and that is all she wants. He is the best looking puppy they saw out of all the ones they looked at...

By this point I was yelling at her and trying to explain what a reputable breeder was which I have got into it with her before. She said that this lady was a reputable breeder and it didn't matter anyhow because she was happy. I told her I hope she is this happy when she takes the puppy to a vet and they tell her he has heart issues or something to that effect. According to her, it doens't matter because all boxers die of cancer...ALL of them. She is so dense...

I told her I was going to find information for her and her boyfriend to read and maybe they could think a little harder before it is too late. She told me not to waste my time because their mind is made up. I told her that was fine, I couldn't stop her but I still wanted her to read some information so at least they would be educated a little more about what they are doing wrong.

She doesn't want to rescue because they make you get the dog neutered. They don't want that because they want to breed her mom's female boxer :o
(We got into it about that before too but it is all ok because, "mom is the biggest animal lover I know")

If anyone knows of any websites or good information I can show her, please post. I am going to show her the prisoners of greed website to start with.
 

simmons

Boxer Insane
hmmm....it sounds to me like her mind is already made up. She is getting her new pup from a BYB and by your post she may not care.....b/c she is also planning to breed. Is she doing her homework when she plans to breed?? Like the health and tempermant testing?? I don't know too much, but there may be other things to check before just breeding two dogs :(

I believe when a pup is shipped it must have a vets permission that the pup is at least 8 weeks old. (I think? My co-worker was looking at puppies online and that's what the breeder said.) So if this breeder was a responsible breeder they wouldn't be shipping a pup to an unknown person.

You can tell her over 8 million dogs get euthanized each year b/c of irresponsible breeding. Maybe show her some rescue websites....they usually have sad, but true stories about each baby. Maybe take her to a shelter or pound??

Good Luck....hopefully someone else can help you.
 

cantfindlog

Completely Boxer Crazy
Wow that is too bad. I can't believe your niece did not come to you for advice. I always read all your posts and you are knowledgable about boxers. Is your niece young? Sounds like it. I have a 20 year old co-worker that asked me about a boxer this summer that she wanted to buy from a BYB and she would not listen to a word I had to say. Then one day she asked me why his nose is so long!! Duh- the first thing in bad breeding. So anyway, I handle my co-worker and her boxer with kid gloves and I try to talk about how I handle things with Molly and give her articles from BW now and again and try to encourage her to take care of the dog properly. Some people have to learn the hard way. Good Luck because if you are like me you will worry about this dog and its future.
 

BXRBESTFRIND

Super Boxer
Do you live close enough to slap her around a little bit becasue obviously discussing the issue civilly is oding no good.

I cant tell you how many times Ive had to explain about breeding and whites since I got my pup. Countless people ask me should breed him hes beautiful!!

As for help tell her she should see the AKC papers before she gets the dog shipped. Explain to her even with papers, AKC is a business and they are not a governing body on breeding ethics so even with papers the pup can easily come from irresponsible breeders.

How about mentioning that if all Boxers die of Cancer wouldnt you want to find the best posible Boxer health wise so they can stay as healthy as posible throughout thier life untill the inevitable CANCER!! Like you wouldnt want to do hip dysplasia and Cancer. An of course mention that Hips/Heart are very easy and normal test to be done to the parents BEFORE THE BREEDING.

Most to all airlines that ship dogs will not ship in extreme heat Too hot or TOo cold the cabin that the keep the dogs in are not pressureized and therefore do not have the temperature regulated.
 

K8IE

Boxer Insane
It does sound like she is of the midset "I am going to do what I want and no one can stop me", so I don't really know what to tell you. I know people like this as well, and no matter what good arguments, education, facts, info I can come up with we just go round and round and come back to the fact that they are stubborn and refuse to see things in a different light or accept that maybe, just maybe, they could be wrong. I personally would say the best thing you could do is direct her to BW, and hope that she would read the BYB consequences posts, and browse around enough to see what it takes to be a responsible breeder and owner and see how strongly we (members and mods) feel about Boxers and want to be a part of that. I know you must feel like you are banging your head against a wall trying to get through to her, and you may or may not make and impact, but at least you will have tried.
 

ELubas

Boxer Insane
Sounds like you have done all you can here. How frustrating :( But some things are beyond our control and you can not drive yourself crazy. Just pray for a healthy pup I guess
 

TossBranAbi

Boxer Insane
Wow that is too bad. I can't believe your niece did not come to you for advice. I always read all your posts and you are knowledgable about boxers. Is your niece young? Sounds like it. I have a 20 year old co-worker that asked me about a boxer this summer that she wanted to buy from a BYB and she would not listen to a word I had to say. Then one day she asked me why his nose is so long!! Duh- the first thing in bad breeding. So anyway, I handle my co-worker and her boxer with kid gloves and I try to talk about how I handle things with Molly and give her articles from BW now and again and try to encourage her to take care of the dog properly. Some people have to learn the hard way. Good Luck because if you are like me you will worry about this dog and its future.


Kara is about 8 months younger than me and I will be 23 on the 24th of this month. Being young isn't an excuse, especially with the valuable resources she has available to her. I have explained to her many times what she is doing and it just isn't sinking in. In her defense, she does have a learning disability but that isn't an excuse, especially since she has proven she can go to college and do well. She knows what she is doing, she just doesn't care. She is the type of person who doesn't think about consequences.

Before she started college this year, she decided she HAD to have a laptop. She went to Staples to apply for a credit card to get one and they needed verification of a few things before they approved her. Instead of taking care of that, she went to a buy here, pay here place and bought a used computer that she is making payments on. After her down payment and her monthly payments, she will be paying over $2000. This is a for a computer that she could have got off of ebay for about $400, brand new. Her excuse was she wasn't buying one off of ebay because things get broken during shipment. It is all about instant gratification with her.

I honestly would like to smack her around but don't think it would do anygood.

She told me a few months ago about a boxer being in the local humane society and told me I should rescue him. This was about two weeks after we rescued Dozer and I don't have room or the resources for another pup. She didn't want to rescue him because he was neutered. I flat out told her she was stupid for wanting to breed the dogs. This was after she told me that her mom's female was outside because she was in heat and they didn't want her to get blood everywhere. Unbelievable...

She has her mind made up that she is getting this puppy, she already loves him because he looks just like the boxer they lost to cancer. I seriously hope she gets a healthy puppy but I wish even more she would listen to me. I have showed her different things from rescues and this site but she is one of those people who think, "that won't happen to me" or "that isn't how it really is in the real world"

Do I really have to claim her as family?? :o
 

Slobberchops

Boxer Insane
Does your niece still live at home,can your sister help put a stop to getting this puppy?
I'm probably asking questions that have already been answered,just wanted to let you know,you're not alone in feeling frustratedsmashicon
 

billbgh

Completely Boxer Crazy
I apologize in advance for this comment but..... Getting her some information that she needs would probably be in the yellow pages under psychology, also, you make a very strong point on health issues(or other) that comes from breeding stock not fit to breed(the white), however, I think that I may be more concerned with your niece breeding instead. Ignorance is a lot of the time hereditary or a learned trait from your environment. I see from your post that you are an extremely intelligent person, so it must be one of those dominant/recessive traits.

Ok, ok, all joking aside, you have done your absolute best to inform and educate her, it just isn't sinking in unfortunately. I always tell people, say your piece and remember, you can't control others actions, just your reaction to their actions. We all know that what she is doing is wrong, and more than likely this will cause her more heartache and grief in the long run, but at least you tried your best to help her out, and it's just too bad that she didn't listen. Try not to stay mad at her, put your positive energy to better use and leave your negative with the words that you gave her.
BTW, I commend your trying to educate someone that is unaware.:)

My hugs to you for being so caring and so darn smart!

Erin
Apollo & Rocky's mom
 

TossBranAbi

Boxer Insane
I have given up trying to help her out, I have told her time and time again what she is getting into but she doesn't care. Kara is a product of a very bad marriage, Kara's mom and my brother were married but then divorced after Kara's mom tried to kill my brother. Kara gets her psychological problems honestly. Kara and her brother have not talked to my brother for 10 or so years because they were being brainwashed. When they kids got old enough to realize what their mother did, they got in contact with their dad. One day Kara just showed up on my doorstep, literally after more than 10 years. Her and her dad no longer talk because Kara was going back and forth telling lies, basically still being brainwashed by her mom. So there really is no one I could go to to have this all stopped, I wish it were that simple.

I provided her with the information that she needs to be more educated. I even told her that I can't stop her but want her to be educated about what she was doing. She flat out told me she wasn't going to take the time to read the information because she already made her mind up. It is a lost cause.

I too am worried about her breeding but there isn't much I can do about that either. Her boyfriend has two male labs and neither one of them are neutered, even after I let them know of the benefits of doing so. Unfortunately I am going to have to give up.

I am going to tell Kara to make sure that the "breeder" puts blankets in the crate with the puppy. Do you think it would be a good idea to have her put a sweater on him also? It is going to be cold during the flight and I don't want to see the little guy get sick, I am just afraid of him getting a toenail or something stuck in the sweater. Thoughts?

Geez, if she is going to buy a byb puppy, why couldn't she at least buy one from around here so they little tyke doesn't have to be flown halfway across the country?
 
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